Chef Interrupted: Discovering Life's Second Course In Ireland With Multiple Sclerosis (Book Review)
My mission of spreading awareness about what Multiple Sclerosis is and to live a quality life using the abilities we have is why I was thrilled to receive the following note from Trevis Gleason. Trevis is a man I've never met but have known for many years through his stellar reputation in the MS community as an inspiring writer and advocate.
As I read his note I thought about the cadence of its language. I could almost hear Trevis speaking with an American English tongue mixed in with a wee bit of Irish brogue. It was endearing.
Then my next thought was, "Of course I want to give your book a look!" because the life that Trevis chose despite a diagnosis of secondary progressive MSis one that exemplifies what it means to live a quality life despite facing adversity.
Let me go back.Trevis Gleason is a former chef who was trained at The New England Culinary Institute. Settling into a directorial position with the California Culinary Academy and opening several cooking schools for the Academy his life abruptly changed after his misdiagnosed ailments turned into a confirmed diagnosis of MS.
But Trevis' new book, Chef Interrupted: Discovering Life's Second Course in Ireland with Multiple Sclerosis is not a book about diagnosis or coming to grips with a "new normal." Chef Interrupted is a celebration of life and the indomitability of the human spirit, illustrating that lifelong dreams can still be realized with a bit of gritty determination, some serious planning, a positive attitude and the ability to laugh at yourself.
And, of course, being surrounded by loved ones, including the furry kind.
His book begins five years after diagnosis, being forced from the job he was trained for, and a marriage that crumbled.
He reveals to the reader:
"If I was to enjoy any of the things I'd hoped to be doing in my far advanced years after a career, I would have to start identifying what those dreams were and create a plan to make them happen. Hope, without a plan, is just a dream."
Our journey as a reader begins alongside of Trevis, from Seattle to a rented, rustic "functional" cottage in West Kerry, Ireland where he remained for the winter. Despite obstacles such as sheep-obstructed narrow roadways, an antiquated heating system, and the general difficulties of beginning a new life in a strange place, the hearty soul of Trevis remained intact.
His masterful tales are woven around the many connections he makes with the lively people of Ireland, his devoted companion, Sadie, an adorable puppy he adopts upon arrival, and the beauty of the rugged countryside that surrounds him.
Rising to the many physical challenges he inevitably faces, Trevis skillfully entertains a steady flow of family and friends who come to visit him. His skills as a master chef come in handy while entertaining, and he whets our appetites throughout the book when discussing simple local food and drink.
We are willing learners about the cultural differences Trevis embraces, and we feel the joy he feels as he immerses himself in his newest homeland.
When Trevis described some of the people he met I was oftenreminded of characters portrayed in a few John Ford movies. Flavorful characters that Barry Fitzgerald or Maureen O'Hara might have played. Colorful, lively and always fascinating.
Trevis weaves magic through his poetic style of storytelling allowing us to, at times, forget that he's living with a debilitating disease, one that catapulted him to visit his family's roots so far away. His story touched my heart, and I know it will touch yours.
This is not a story about disability but one about finding your joy no matter what life has to offer.
If you've ever had a dream you'll want to take a look at Chef Interrupted. It'll keep hope in your heart and help you believe that anything is possible.
Chef Interrupted: Discovering Life's Second Course in Ireland with Multiple Sclerosiswill be released on Amazon on March 1, 2015, but is available for pre-order by clicking here today.
NOTE: I received an advance copy of Chef Interrupted: Discovering Life's Second Course in Ireland with Multiple Sclerosis. As always, all opinions expressed are solely my own.
Thank A Caregiver: November Is National Family Caregivers Month
Disclosure: November is National Family Caregivers Month, so I'm pleased to be working with Midlife Boulevard to bring you this important public service information.
My husband has been my caregiver for the past 26 years. He sees what no one else sees of my daily struggles with Multiple Sclerosis. He selflessly and lovingly steps in to take care of me, but it's a job he never asked for. There've been times when it's extremely stressful but he's never complained. He does his best each day to keep me as happy and healthy as possible.
Our son has grown up seeing our loving relationship, and today the three of us are a close-knit family who are a team. I know that someday if he is called upon to take care of someone he loves, he'll be more than able to do it. He's had the best example in his father.
My family (1994)
That is the reason why I was thrilled to learn that November is National Family Caregivers Month. AARP and the Ad Council have launched new public service announcements (PSAs) illustrating how the changing role of parents and children can impact your life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVvFamFrdww
Since its inception in 2012 the Caregiver Assistance campaign has received over $72.4 million in donated media and AARP.com/caregiving has received more than 15 millions visits.
There's a reason why there is so much interest. More than 42 million caregivers in the U.S. provide an estimated $450 billion worth of unpaid care to aging relatives and friends, because most caregivers are also working and managing their own families. This is stressful and can put the caregiver at risk for physiological and financial problems.
Over the years I've had the privilege of knowing many other caregivers who selflessly care for loved ones. Their job is a difficult one, and it's one they never imagined they'd have. But when you see a loved one struggling with an illness you jump in to help.
A sense of community for caregivers, where they can share stories with other caregivers or find resources for information, is important to keep their sanity! AARP has provided a host of resources to create such a caring community:
Prepare to Care (Caregiving Planning Guide for Families)
I want to take this opportunity to thank all caregivers everywhere, and to AARP and the Ad Council for helping to raise awareness about this important issue. From my heart to yours..
New Happiness Study By LANCET: Are You Middle Age Or A Senior?
As I was driving to meet a friend for lunch I turned the radio on to NPR's program "Here and Now" as they were beginning to discuss a new study published by LANCET. Michelle Roberts, the BBC News online Health Editor, was explaining a new happiness study that was linked to age, and that life follows a predictable course depending on where people live.
I quickly thought what perfect timing this was since the broadcast sounded fascinating and could be the subject of my next NaBloPoMo post.
That was until I heard:
"In Western world nations, life satisfaction bottomed out between the ages of 45 and 54 before rising again."
According to this study midlife was between the ages of 45 -54. Whoa! Really? For the next few minutes I didn't hear anything except the sound of my own thoughts racing inside my head.
A few of them were:
Are those ages correct?
Who makes up age ranges? What are they based on?
At age 55 am I suddenly considered a senior citizen?
Do I need to start checking off my Bucket List items a little faster?
The study went on to say that, "This is the period at which wage rates typically peak and is the best time to work and earn the most."
Oh, boy.
So if they are correct about the age range of midlife, then my husband and I already hit our peak of wage rates (yikes!) AND we are now senior citizens (double yikes!)
When I got home I checked a few sources on the Internet to see whether or not I was a senior citizen. I found that the U.S. Census says middle age is anywhere between ages 35 - 54.
Oh, no. It's getting worse.
However, the updated version of The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (the standard diagnostic manual of The American Psychiatric Association) defines it as 45 - 65.
Phew.
Suddenly I began feeling ashamed of myself. Why? Because my reaction to the definition of midlife did not coincide with what I write, what I believe in or what I preach to others.
In the end, it really doesn't matter what the study, the census, the manual, or the gods-that- be say.
I am 55 years old, and there aren't any statistics that can change the essence of who I am. I am the same person I was before and after I listened to the program. So when I tell someone "You're as young as you feel" I sincerely mean it.
Whether I'm in my middle years or a senior citizen doesn't matter. What matters is what's in my heart, and how I feel about who I am.
Can You Feel Better On A Gluten-Free Diet? Take Notes Jennifer Lawrence
A few weeks ago I stopped following The Jenny Craig program. Since then I’ve been on a quest to find a “way of life” meal plan to follow. It was easy to follow their program. Five minutes before it was time to eat, I’d pop an entrée into the microwave, make a side dish and BAM! My delicious meal was ready to eat.
Now I have to carefully plan my meals, and since I don’t like to cook this is not an easy task. I want to lose a few more pounds, and I'd like to depend on the food I eat to help me feel better, stronger and more energized.
Doesn’t everyone?
So I turned to some trusted friends who are as health-conscious as they are smart. Their advice began a fascinating discussion that clearly begged to be written about.
For some time now I’ve been thinking about the role gluten plays in our diet, and whether I should eliminate it from mine. I heard many anecdotal stories about people feeling healthier without gluten, a protein composite found in wheat and related grains, rye and barley.
Despite what Jennifer Lawrence recently said about gluten-free diets being the "new, cool eating disorder" friends living with an autoimmune disease have told me remarkable stories about getting off medications, or regaining the ability to run or walk while living gluten-free. These are amazing stories that I can’t ignore.
Can you?
Most people think gluten-free diets are only for people with celiac disease, but that simply isn’t true. There is such as thing as “non-celiac gluten sensitivity”; people who don’t test positive for celiac disease yet share the same sensitivities to gluten.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, they have reactions that may include headaches, fogginess, joint pain, and numbness. (You can read more about non-celiac gluten sensitivity at The National Foundation for Celiac Awareness website.)
Ten years ago I tried eliminating gluten from my diet at the suggestion of my neurologist. I’ve always battled headaches and they were getting worse. But finding gluten-free products wasn’t easy
Today? They are available everywhere, from health food stores to supermarkets to big chain stores like Target.
I decided to reach out to fellow blogger Kim Austin whose blog, MS Diet for Women, focuses on helping women feel better by using a combination of eating right, exercising and practicing stress reduction. I asked her to guide me on my diet journey. My first assigned task?
“Cut out all gluten, dairy, sugar and meat. Eat a lot of vegetables, fruits, fish and nuts. Drink a large glass of water 15 minutes before each meal.”
Yikes!
I’m preparing myself for my first coaching and motivational session with Kim. I'm going to test these new waters to see if this “diet” (one followed by MANY people in the MS and autoimmune community) helps me feel better and lose more weight.
I’m a little anxious about this next step. I’ve had a lifelong battle with my weight, and as I age I find my MS kicking in a bit more. I'll give this a try and see how I do.
Wish me luck!
Have you ever been on a diet that helped you feel better?
For thirteen years Americans have mourned and paid tribute to the tragic and senseless loss of lives that happened on our soil in the bright, cloudless skies on September 11, 2001. We've heard countless stories emerge about family and friends who perished that day. Every year we exchange details about where we were when we first learned of the shocking news that, at first, seemed like a piece of science fiction.
The Morris County 9/11 Living Memorial: Plaques with the 64 Morris County residents and the names of all the victims are displayed at the site.
Last night our community gathered for a candlelight vigil and service to pay tribute to the 64 victims we lost from Morris County, New Jersey on September 11. Held before the county's 9/11 Living Memorial built from 3 steel sections from The World Trade Center, pieces of United Flight #93 and surrounded by soil from The Pentagon,we joined together in solidarity as American citizens, and as residents of New Jersey mourning those we lost.
The 9/11 Living Memorial: This memorial is comprised of three steel sections from the World Trade Center, pieces of United Flight #93, and soil from the Pentagon. The concrete blocks at the base of the steel represent the foundations of our lives: family, relationships and community.
On the morning of September 11, 2001 I pulled my son out of school because forty miles away our beloved Manhattan was under attack. Like many other moms standing in line, we wanted our children with us because we simply didn't know what, if anything, might happen next.
Sitting at last night's candlelight vigil with my adult son sitting beside me, these thoughts came flooding back. Our world, and his, were forever changed.
Bless You, America: The flag against the beauty of the night sky
With September 11 looming and the heinous and violent acts occurring around the world, we are reminded of the fragility of life, the importance of kindness, tolerance and compassion, and the responsibility we have to help one another as best as we can.
A lone bagpipe played while local police and EMS workers marched past us to begin the ceremony
My wish for you and your loved ones is for a world where peaceful coexistence is not only possible but is the norm, where goodness overcomes evil, and that all of our lives are blessed with joy and good health.
"Gene Kelly: The Legacy" And An Exclusive Interview With Patricia Ward Kelly On The Life Of Her Late Husband
PROLOGUE
Here’s an easy question for you: Can you name a legendary dancer and innovative choreographer who also successfully directed movies, and whose athleticism, masculinity and exuberance won audiences’ hearts the world over each time his magical gifts leapt onto the silver screen?
There’s only one correct answer: Gene Kelly.
His magic was palpable every time he dazzled us on the screen. Classics such as “On the Town”, “An American In Paris” and the musical of musicals, “Singin' in the Rain” were phenomenons yesterday and still are today.
After hearing that Gene Kelly’s widow/biographer, Patricia Ward Kelly, was finally bringing her unique show, GENE KELLY: THE LEGACY - AN EVENING WITH PATRICIA WARD KELLY, to New York City I was ecstatic. I couldn’t wait to buy my ticket to learn more about the man and the performer from the person who knew him best.
After my friend and fellow blogger Lisa Carpenter of Grandma’s Briefs reviewed this event last year, I became excited about seeing Mrs. Kelly using her mix of rare and familiar film clips, unreleased audio clips from conversations with her husband, while adding her own thoughtful commentary to give us a behind-the-scenes look at her husband.
This would be the stuff my dreams are made of.
The first time the Kelly’s met was in 1985, when Patricia Ward was 26 and her future husband was 73. She was hired as a writer for a television special. Her husband, as she tells it, was a last minute replacement for Gregory Peck. On her way to the bathroom, dressed in work boots and a typical “big hairstyle” of the 1980’s, she ran into a dapper gentleman who simply said hello.
She had no idea who he was.
He eventually invited her to join him in California to help write his memoirs. They fell in love and married in 1990. They remained married until his death in 1996.
When Patricia agreed to a telephone interview a week before the event, I was thrilled. Our conversation started off by talking about family, film and the genius of Gene Kelly. It felt comfortable to speak with her, and her amiable manner made it easy for us to chat for forty-five fascinating minutes.
Photo Credit: The Gene Kelly Legacy/Facebook Photo/Stand for the Arts/Symphony Space
THE GENE KELLY LEGACY/INTERVIEW WITH PATRICIA WARD KELLY
Gene Kelly has been gone for almost twenty years, yet his body of work is timeless. He has influenced countless performers with his innovations in dance, choreography and directing.
His dream was to become a shortstop for his hometown Pittsburgh Pirates. Instead he became a classically trained ballet dancer, and studied modern dance with Martha Graham and Doris Humphrey. A trained acrobat and gymnast, he could even walk a tightrope
He fell in love with in jazz, and also enjoyed American composers such as Cole Porter and Irving Berlin's music to dance to. After the crash of 1929 he began to choreograph dance to win prize money for his family.
Eventually he landed in New York.
Searching for work as a choreographer eventually led him to a minor role in a Cole Porter play, then onto his breakthrough role in, “The Time Of Your Life,” and finally Broadway stardom as the lead in “Pal Joey.”
But Hollywood kept calling, and he answered the call with his screen debut in, "For Me and My Gal" opposite Judy Garland. Soon after, he appeared in his breakthrough role as a dancer on film in “Cover Girl”, co-starring Rita Hayworth, where he created an innovative routine dancing against his shadow at a time, as Mrs. Kelly points out, when there were no computers to edit the scene.
That’s when he decided to challenge himself to change the way dance looked on film because it was, as his wife said, two-dimensional. He illustrated the best of dance by choreographing dancers to move towards the camera, using light and color to add a third dimension, and insisting that dancers’ full figures be filmed instead of close-ups of arms or feet.
Using inanimate objects such as a mop, a newspaper, a cartoon character named Jerry or dancing with his shadow, Gene Kelly successfully won his own challenge.
Part of the reason Patricia Kelly created her show was to illustrate how relevant her husband’s work is today. She’s traveling around the world, and makes a point to introduce his work to younger audiences. As she told me, “It continues to resonate with them, and they see he is cool and relevant and he still doesn’t seem dated."
“I am taking it to universities and high schools so young people can get a different appreciation. Then when they look at contemporary musicals they’ll see it differently, that they are chopped up. It’s really body parts, which is what Gene really disliked.
“He’s still the go-to guy for choreographers, dancers, cinematographers and directors. He set a standard. They’d learn quite a bit if they’d study why he did what he did. That’s what I hope to do with this show. I hope to educate people in an entertaining way."
She entertained us for three solid hours, and showed us how authentic she is by personally greeting us as we arrived at the theater.
Gene Kelly, Debbie Reynolds and Donald O'Connor in Singin' in the Rain trailer (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Her one-woman show felt as if she had invited us to “sit on the couch” with the Kelly’s. (A phrase she repeatedly used. It was a favorite spot for the couple to sit and chat while they listened to some of Mr. Kelly’s favorite songs, including songs by Mr. Kelly’s dear friend, confidante, and three-time co-star, Frank Sinatra.)
“I had the privilege of recording him (Gene) nearly every day for over ten years,” Mrs. Kelly told me over the phone, “so I have a story that no one else has. But I do tell people that Gene’s is an extraordinary legacy to represent in any fashion. He doesn’t need any help because it stands on his own. When we talked about it, Gene was explicit in how he wished to be remembered. It is for being behind the camera, and for the innovations with the choreography and the use of the camera and capturing dance.
“Many people who know of his work don’t think about him in those terms. They think of some glorious man up on the screen, and don’t understand how radical it was in what he was doing with Jerry the Mouse and "Cover Girl."
“Unlike a singer, you can look away for a minute but don’t miss the song. But with a dancer if you look away, you just interrupted the whole sequence; you missed something.
“His whole thing is that the camera had to stay on the dancer. I think sadly that today it’s the editors and camera operators who are making the choices of the shots, as opposed to someone who really understands the dance. And so I encourage a lot of today’s choreographers to direct and call the shots like Gene did. Maybe they will start to do that and start to turn things around.
"It’s funny because Gene was more contemporary 60 years ago than what we see today. He was newer and fresher than the stuff we’re seeing now.”
Gene Kelly portrait (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
EPILOGUE
Patricia Ward Kelly talks to me about Gene Kelly exclusively for An Empowered Spirit:
On his influences:
“As far as tap it was Bill (Bojangles) Robinson. He knew him before he was “Bojangles” and spoke of him a lot. And a guy named Clarence Dancing Dotson, who he saw in Pittsburgh. A lot of traveling acts that came through Pittsburgh influenced him.
I just wrote a piece for "Biography" that you see Bill Robinson in “Moses Supposes” in the "Singin' in the Rain" number itself. Bill had a style that Gene just loved. He loved the perfection and precision of his taps and the clean sound. He thought he was the epitome of tap dancing.”
On having to repeatedly answer the same questions (and promising I d ask fresh and never-before-asked questions):
“Well, no, that's okay. I think it’s good to get it out. I think you make a really good point and this is again, the method to my madness in this show because people don’t realize Gene had such breadth in his dancing and in his choreography. What I try to do subtly is to let people see the different styles of dance, so they can see the dimensions. That’s really important because I think that is what distinguishes him."
On what Gene Kelly would want dancers to be working on today:
“Instead of creating new material, they are doing stage versions of, for example, ‘Singin' in the Rain.’ They kind of go back and redo the stuff that’s been done, and that’s not what Gene wanted. He didn’t want people to imitate what he had done, he wanted them to take it and make it their own.
One of the dancers for the American Ballet Theatre, Herman Cornejo, was deeply influenced by Gene, and has become this extraordinary classical dancer who also plays a role as he’s dancing, so he really embodies Gene, as does the Italian dancer Roberto Bolle.
And a lot of the dancers at The New York City Ballet and a lot at ABT and a lot at San Francisco Ballet and Joffrey. They are doing it in a slightly different way, but they definitely are absorbing it and taking it forward.
Then there are a lot of these choreographers that I meet, and they’ve memorized all of Gene’s stuff and are trying to incorporate it, taking and doing things with it and experimenting. A lot of them need to move into the director’s role so that they have the control over the work, otherwise they’re creating things but it’s not executed quite the same.”
About the demographics and love of the show:
“I’m seeing audiences from ages 9 – 90, with half men and half women, which is unusual. It cuts across all economic divisions. I am still continued to be amazed with the letters I get after the show, and what aspects of his career has touched someone.
"I get just as much out of doing this as the people who see the show. I’d do this every night if I could. I’d do it every place in the world if I could.”
On directing movies such as "Hello Dolly", "Cheyenne Social Club" and "Guide for the Marrying Man":
“He preferred to direct and choreograph. He’d just as soon not be in front of the camera, but the studio wanted him to perform. He much preferred to be in the creative seat, and he directed several things just primarily for the people who were in them. "Cheyenne Social Club" is a great example with Jimmy Stewart and Hank Fonda, and "Gigot" with Jackie Gleason.
"Gene was disappointed in "Gigot" because he thought Jackie Gleason had the right of final cut and it turned out he didn’t, and they both were extremely unhappy with what the Seven Arts people did.
"In the archives there are wonderful black and white photographs of the two of them shooting that. And again it isn’t well known of the relationship between the two, and there’ll be quite a lot about it in the book, when I finish it.”
About co-starring in "Inherit the Wind" with film heavyweights Spencer Tracy and Frederic March:
“It’s really a superb performance, and as I say in the show, he went to the rushes the first day and never went back. He felt he did the best he possibly could with two giants.”
Kelly as Hornbeck in Inherit the Wind
On retiring:
“He was very conscious of his own image, and in retiring, when he knew he couldn’t jump over the tables the way that he used to, he retired.
"I think Gene was very right to end his career so he stays kind of evergreen. He’s kind of always preserved in this contemporary manner and I think that was very smart on his part."
On working on his legacy:
“After his house fire in 1983, many of his letters and photographs survived. There is an extraordinary collection that I inherited from Gene, and I think he knew I was a trained archivist. I’m working on cataloguing everything, documenting it, and putting everything in archival sleeves. It will all ultimately go to a public institution.
"I don’t believe it should stay in private hands. I believe it should be available to the world and I’m kind of working on a virtual exhibition of it so that people can access it around the world if they can’t travel to a particular place.
"He and I went through a lot of things together, the photographs for example, and he would comment on them and I annotated them.
"The same with the letters. We went through those, so I have a lot of his responses to the letters. It’s a huge volume of material, and I’m still going through a lot of it, and I discover new things every day.
"I’m kind of looking forward to getting back into that. I’ve been on the road so much with the show I haven’t had as much time to get in and work on the archives.
"It’s exciting because it’s an extraordinary collection of the history of the 20th century through correspondences. He was so connected to so many different types of people, not just dancers and filmmakers, but politicians, historians, writers and artists.
"I try to connect all the dots wondering what play did he see that night and what are they all commenting on? What was the date and what theatre?
"But talk about great work, if you’re going to be passionate about something, this is a pretty great thing to be passionate about!"
What Patricia said that made me feel even happier:
“I think you have a very broad and appropriate understanding of him and his work. Some people have much less knowledge of his real contribution, so I think he would certainly appreciate that”.
I certainly hope so!
END NOTES
Check out The Gene Kelly Legacy website, and sign up to stay abreast of events and activities. You can also visit their Facebook page to keep up with Patricia. I hope she will be coming to a location near you!
The Dizzy Feet Foundation is an organization Patricia is passionate about. Their mission is to support, improve and increase access to dance education in the United States.
"The Sapphires": An Uplifting Movie That Will Make You Want To Dance
There are times in a person’s life when you’re faced with challenges that force you to discover who you really are.
This is one of those times.
As a writer I write about what I know: ability, mindfulness, joy and wellness. These are topics that guide my life.
A beautiful flower, the sound of my son’s laughter, my cats playing, and my husband’s smile are constants in my life that bring me joy and comfort.
What else comforts me? A good movie, of course! One that lifts my spirits and touches my heart. This weekend, my husband and I watched such a movie called “The Sapphires” (2012). It’s an Australian musical comedy-drama based on a true story about 4 aboriginal girls who, in the late 1960’s, form a singing group called – of course – The Sapphires.
The story centers around 3 sisters and their cousin. After losing a local singing contest because of the color of their skin, one of the sisters decides to enter the group in a singing contest that will visit the troops in Viet Nam. They win the contest, and are soon off on a singing tour in war-torn Viet Nam. And the story begins.
I loved this story for many reasons:
I enjoy movies based on true stories. It’s always fun to learn about historical events coinciding with the time frame of the movie. For example, I learned that in the late 1960’s aboriginal rights were finally being addressed. The cousin in “The Sapphires” was lighter in skin color. As a child she was kidnapped and sold to a white family. The circumstances of this story brought the family back together, but at times there was a price to pay.
The news broadcasted on television provided the serious backdrop of the civil unrest happening in The United States, including the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr. While this is an important piece to the story, it is done with a light touch so that it doesn’t interfere with the lighthearted and fun aspects of the film.
I enjoy seeing “real” photographs during the end credits, learning what the actual characters look like and where they are today.
The music throughout the film is fun and makes you want to get up and dance. Songs such as “I Heard It Through The Grapevine”, “Soul Man”, “I’ll Take You There” and “Sugar Pie Honey Bunch” was a lot of fun to hear again.
The groovy fashions of the singing group brought me back to the sixties. Remember go-go boots, mini skirts, psychedelic colors and big hair? They got ‘em!
I’d give this movie a big thumbs up, and encourage you to see it when you’re in the mood for a feel-good movie that will put a smile on your face. One critic called it “The Dream Girls of Australia” and I agree.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2Ty4r6mvgg
“The Sapphires” is available on demand on Netflix. Winner of the Best Feature Film for Screenplay/Adaptation, 2012, from the Australian Writers Guild; Best Original Soundtrack/Cast/Show Album from The Australian Recording Industry Association, 2012.
We all know the quote that is attributed to John Lennon saying, "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans." The quote is brilliant because it's honest and true.
An ordinary day can turn on a dime.
A person rarely reaches my age without learning some hard lessons about life after facing illness, financial struggles, toxic relationships or tragedy. These are inevitable as we age, and the lessons we learn forces us to acquire some survival skills.
If you're wise you'll realize that being flexible about the inevitable twists and turns of life is healthier for you. Because the life we plan and the life we lead are, more times than not, two very different things.
Bending instead of breaking is always optimal.
For instance, over the past week I said farewell to a dear friend.
and cared for a sick one.
I celebrated some exciting family successes,
and was mindful of a few happy moments walking by.
It's important to remain focused on staying healthy while maneuvering the highs and lows of daily life. Eating right, getting plenty of exercise and practicing a stress-reducing activity (such as meditation) will help keep our bodies happy as we age.
It was the 1980's and big hair was, well, BIG!
Here's what worked for me this week:
Visualizing how I want to look and feel: At 55 I won't feel like I did at 25, 35, or 45. I'm trying to be the best ME I can be at this age. I'm not perfect. I stumble and fall, but I always try to get myself back up to try even harder.
Eating less: I have the Jenny Craig meal plan on my side to help me eat healthy meals, and I add fresh fruits and vegetables to each meal. This week I ate several meals out, so I'd cut up fresh veggies and carried them in a Zip-Lock bag in my purse. I tried to plan what I'd eat before every outing (a special thanks to Houston's tuna sashimi salad with cilantro viniagrette - a big yum!) Was I perfect? No. I'm a work in progress. But I'm eating healthier than I was a year ago. That's a step in the right direction!
Finally met Carol April of ndy (Not Done Yet) and she came bearing gifts and a new friendship.
Feeling better about the way I look: I'm fighting every (single) ounce to get off my body. It's a battle, and so far I've lost 12 pounds since December. I don't want to gain any weight back after working so hard to take them off. That fact continues to motivate me.
I like telling my husband that I'm losing weight: Okay, I admit it. It feels good to tell my husband my good news. Do you have any idea what it's like to be married to someone who weighs the same as he did when we met 29 years ago? He is dedicated to eating right and getting plenty of exercise. He also has great metabolism! This can be maddening at times, so I try to imagine what it feels like to never worry about gaining weight. Ah, Utopia.
What do you do to take care of your health as you age?
*I received a free month on the Jenny Craig program and a discount on food for this review. There was no compensation. All opinions are solely my own. NOTE: Clients following the Jenny Craig program lose, on average, 1 -2 lbs. per week.
Two Videos That Help Us Do A Happy Dance To Celebrate Spring
What did I hear? It's spring? I don't believe it. When I look out my window there's still snow on the ground. The temperatures are in the forties. I need more proof.
But it is late March, so I'm going to do my happy dance anyway (be wary, Elaine Benes) because I know that shortly I'll be able to shed my heavy coat and sweater, walk outside, and feel the sun warm up my cold, winterized body.
I'll let this movie mashup take it from here. You'll want to get up and dance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9l5TrAXScbE
I couldn't end this post without a nod to my favorite commercial, one that's always made me happy. You can't sit still during this one with Cary, Gene, Groucho and Twinkletoes.
Two Must-See Movies That Will Capture Your Heart (Movie Review)
I recently learned about a groundbreaking film festival touring the country called The REELAbilities Film Festival. Created in 2007, this festival is dedicated to spreading awareness about disability through film. It offers an opportunity to see award-winning movies, by and about people living with disabilities, in a city near you.
I was fortunate to see three of their films, two that I will review here; the third I’ll review in a separate post
Gabrielle (2013, French with subtitles): Gabrielle, a 2013 Canadian Oscar nominated film, is a simple love story about a young woman with William’s Syndrome who has an infectious zest for life and a strong need to live a “normal” one. She falls in love with Martin, a young man she meets at the recreation center where they both are choir members. Gabrielle and Martin become inseparable until Martin’s mother fears they are becoming intimate, causing her decision to keep her son home and away from Gabrielle’s heart.
I highly recommend this movie for several reasons. First, I felt I was not being hit over the head with any heavy moral messages. The director used a soft touch by allowing the characters and the story to gently unfold, weaving its way in and out of delicate matters that finally landing directly into my heart..
Another reason I enjoyed Gabrielle was because of Gabrielle Marion-Rivard and her joie de vivre performance in the lead role. This was her first professional role, yet this remarkable young woman with her captivating smile and sweet disposition was a joy to watch. She was the character, and her performance was certainly award worthy.
Her role allowed us to take a peek inside her world, and through her we see what life is like when able-bodied people don’t understand the abilities someone can possess despite any disability they may have.
It’s All About Friends (2014, Swedish with subtitles): I strongly recommend this feel-good movie that uses disabled actors as some of the main characters (as does Gabrielle). The film centers around a circle of friends who live in a group home, and decide they’d like to make a film about their lives. Their friend, Peter, calls his old friend, Max, who is about to commit suicide. Unknowingly, Peter’s phone call saves Max’s life. Max agrees to shoot the film, but doesn’t know it will center on people with varying disabilities. He is now forced to face his own prejudices.
This is a sweet movie with characters that charm themselves into our hearts. It’s an indie-type movie that makes us glad we took the time to watch it. We cheer the characters on as we realize that their goodness and valuable insight is teaching us that disability doesn’t mean inability.
To find venues and the schedule of events for all of the films, please visit the REELAbilities Film Festival website.
What Was Your Self-Image In Grade School? A Baby Boomer's Tale Of Changing How We View Ourselves
There it was. That dreaded scale. The one I thought would ring a bell loudly and shout,"Oh, jeez, please get off of me!"
I remember when I was young and my mother was on a diet. She put a gadget inside our refrigerator that, after opening the door to find something to eat, would scream "Close the door, fatty!"
I hated that contraption.
Self-image is an important reason why women (and men) spend thousands of dollars on beauty products each year. According to an article in MarketWatch.com, the Commerce Department reported, "Americans spent a whopping $33.3 billion on cosmetics and other beauty products in 2010, up 6% from 2009."
And according to a 2013 article in TIME article, "The American Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS) says that while total cosmetic surgeries fell by 2% last year, the number of what they call “minimally invasive” procedures rose by 6%. The most popular of these were Botox and Dysport injections, followed by soft tissue filler injections, chemical peels, laser hair removal, and microdermabrasion."
We all want to look good.
But at what price? Our self-image starts when we're young. We begin by comparing ourselves to the most popular girls in grade school.
You know, the girls all the boys were going ga-ga over while our hormones were raging out of control. The ones with straight, shiny hair, button noses and long, slender legs who were good in gym and always wore the coolest clothes.
Sorry to digress. That was my memory. What? Did I hear you nodding your head? Phew.
Today, the news about self-image for young people is appalling. Take a look at recent statistics:
One study reports that at age thirteen, 53% of American girls are "unhappy with their bodies." This grows to 78% by the time girls reach seventeen. (Teen Health and the Media)
The number of cosmetic surgical procedures performed on youth under age 19 more than tripled from 1997 to 2007. (The Representation Project)
In 2011, Dove® released the findings of its largest global study to date on women’s relationship with beauty—The Real Truth About Beauty: Revisited. The study revealed that only 4% of women around the world consider themselves beautiful, and that anxiety about looks begins at an early age. (The Dove Campaign for Real Beauty)
I don't know about you, but I find these numbers appalling. A female's self-image needs a lift, and young girls urgently need our help.
How can this be done?
Through education and awareness. And the buck stops here.
As a baby boomer and a mother, I feel a sense of urgency to portray ourselves in a positive light, and to be good role models for young people. However and whenever we can, we need to write messages that clearly demonstrate we are beautiful no matter what the scale says.
What society deems, and what glossy magazines portray, is not reality.
I want my clothes to fit better, and I'd like to feel healthier. It's simply unhealthy to carry any extra weight, especially when there are family genetics skewed in the wrong direction.
Taking steps toward wellness and living a healthier lifestyle is why I began the Jenny Craig program. I want to get back to eating regular portion sizes, bump up the amount of fresh fruits and vegetables I consume, drink more water and get more exercise.
When I was young I wanted to look like Christie Brinkley. Today, I am comfortable in my own skin.
I don't have straight, shiny hair or long, slender legs. But I do have my own unique brand of beauty, and that is something that every one of us has.
What did the scale say to me? It said "job well done" and "thanks beautiful."
At least in my heart it did.
What can you do to help change a young girl's self image?
*I received a free month on the Jenny Craig program and a discount on food products. There was no compensation. All opinions are solely my own. NOTE: Members following the Jenny Craig program lose, on average, 1 -2 lbs. per week.
When Life Keeps Handing You Lemons: Handling The Difficulties Of Life
Lately I've been thinking about this quote from the Bible:
"God only gives us what we can handle."
While it's often said that this quote appears in the Bible, that is a fallacy. Instead, the actual verse goes like this:
"No temptation has seized you that isn't common for people. But God is faithful. He won't allow you to be tempted beyond your abilities. Instead, with the temptation, God will also supply a way out so that you will be able to endure it. "~Corinthians 10:13
SPOILER: Don't worry. I'm not going to start preaching about religion, the existence of G-d or espouse my personal beliefs.
Life throws us curve balls
It's inevitable that life will throw us curves as we age. If we're lucky, we live a life filled with many blessings, and the darkness of illness, financial hardships or despair rarely comes our way.
But unfortunately that is not always the case. While it seems as if some people sail through life unscathed by darkness, others seem to have darkness dumped on them. When that happens, it feels as if a pitching machine is throwing curve balls at you while you stand still, too paralyzed to move.
"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful." ~Buddha
Life has been throwing me many curve balls lately, and although I try to stay strong and positive, there are times when I just give up.
I give in to sadness, and begin to feel sorry for myself. I'm only human.
I see friends traveling around the country and wish I could join them. I see healthy, vibrant people not being weighed down by the worry of illness. I'm jealous of anyone living in a warm climate and not having to deal with this unnerving winter weather. (How many more days until spring???)
Feeling this way won't change anything, and it's a destructive and useless way to be. But what can I do to change it?
How I focus on the positive while living (and aging) with MS
As we age, it's important for us to learn how to focus on getting through the difficulties of life as best as we can. There are a myriad of ways to do this. Here are some I'm going to try. How about you?
Do what you love. Playing a sport, spending more time with your children, joining a gym, writing or knitting, or picking up a hobby you've put aside are some ideas. Refocusing your attention can revitalize and refresh your mind, body and spirit.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: Replacing negative thoughts with positive ones is invaluable. "Cognitive-behavioral therapy is based on the idea that our thoughts cause our feelings and behaviors, not external things, like people, situations, and events. The benefit of this fact is that we can change the way we think to feel / act better even if the situation does not change." ~National Association of Cognitive Behavioral Therapists
Acknowledge your blessings : Acknowledging the blessings in your life - family, friends, accomplishments at work - is a powerful tool. Focus on them. Then let the people in your life know how much they mean to you. You'll be surprised at how good that will make you feel.
Take time for yourself - Take a bubble bath and light some candles for a relaxing getaway from the world. Get a hot stone massage. Take a walk in the park to surround yourself with the beauty in nature. Watch an old movie that makes you laugh. Do something that feels good and rejuvenates you. You deserve it.
Set daily goals for yourself - Use the ease of a program like Google Calendar to schedule daily personal tasks that make you happy. These personal goals will help you feel good, and are important for your well-being.
Don't allow any disasters to pull you down - Remind yourself of your successes, and remember the people who love you unconditionally and support you. Life is filled with ups and downs. What's important is how you handle them.
The miracle of everyday blessings
My fabulous cousin Gabrielle always knows the right thing to say. She empowers me with her wit and wisdom, especially when she says that when we're tested in life, it only means something awesome is waiting to happen.
I think Gabrielle's advice aligns itself with the quote from the Bible that's been on my mind. I finally understand that the strength we need to endure lies within ourselves. We must believe in the miracle of every day blessings, and the knowledge that we have the power to change how we think and feel.
