Taking a Break While the Seasons Go Round and Round in the Circle Game

The air is turning crisp while leaves dangle from their branches. Acorns lie carelessly on the ground waiting for hungry squirrels to gather them in anticipation of winter. Life goes on, as it always does. And the seasons, they go round and round.

I’m finding it hard to focus, to put pen to paper about MS research that was recently announced in Paris at ECTRIMS. So much has happened in my world in 2017 that writing feels like a Herculean effort. I didn’t anticipate this happening to me. Writing has always been my passion. At times it’s been cathartic to watch the empty pages fill up, sometimes helping me arrive at realizations and conclusions I never expected.

When we’re faced with adversity we can never anticipate how we’ll respond. While we want to remain strong we place too much pressure on ourselves to be that person, that dependable someone who lifts others up at a time when they’re faltering. We try to muddle through our own demons when we’d rather be doing anything other than what we are.

In the midst of writing this post I was reminded of the 1948 movie “State of the Union” where the great Katharine Hepburn once again played Spencer Tracy’s wife. Tracy's character is an industrialist who is persuaded to run for president. As he begins to make political and marital compromises Hepburn gives an impassioned speech on how Tracy can’t fool the voters because they can smell compromise a mile away.

Why am I reminded of this particular line?

As much as I want and need to write about the important MS news, and report on other subjects you typically find on this blog I feel that you, the reader, will notice my heart and soul are in need of repair. Honesty and integrity must never be compromised.

That's why I’ve been taking a short break, to take care of myself, to make some repairs. It’s something we all need to do every once in awhile. There's no shame in that. In fact, it's a necessity.

Woe is certainly not me. My dad was my mentor and moved on no matter what curves were thrown his way. I learned from the best. Illness and grief won’t keep me down for long. This is just a breather. I promise.

Remember to take a breather when you need it, too. The changing seasons will always be there to help us move forward.

"And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game." ~Joni Mitchell, The Circle Game