Four Ways to Look for Inner Peace After 2021 and a Wish for 2022

As we wind down the year I wanted to say a few quick words.

The year 2021 was an extraordinarily difficult one. If you’ve experienced sickness, loss, or struggles of any kind I hope you’re finding your way through the darkness as best and as quickly as possible.

I know firsthand that COVID can linger physically and emotionally. With three vaccines on my side, it could’ve been much worse. I’m grateful for scientists, essential workers, and the people in my life who care about my welfare.

Four Ways to Look for Inner Peace After 2021 and a Wish for 2022

In 2021 I experienced unexpected sadness and disappointment and was desperate to find ways to cope. I made a commitment to:

What have you done to cope with the mental and physical struggles that’ve come your way this year? What’s worked? What hasn’t? What do you need help with? I’d love to hear your story and perhaps I can tackle some answers for you in a future blog post.

“When the soul becomes unburdened it's like a new saddle on a fresh horse. Suddenly the trail feels right again, and the strong horizon line in front of you as your turn becomes its own form of soothing medicine. Something of the sting and burn of the old poison may linger, but having crossed over from the Shadowlands into new open territory, one can almost pick up the scent of blooming flowers within. - from "The Bouquet of the Last Direction," The School of Soft-Attention” ― Hawk of the Pines (Frank LaRue Owen

That’s it for now. I told you’d I’d be quick! I know we’re all inundated at the end-of-the-year so I wanted to sneak in a quick hello and see how you’re doing.

I wish you a healthy, safe, and Happy New Year! Spread a little kindness and hope to those who are suffering. Our world could use a lot more tender loving care.

From our home to yours, I remain your friend,

Cathy

END NOTE: To find accessible locations (in general) in all major cities check out the user-generated database AXS MAP, powered by GoogleMaps API. The creator, Jason DeSilva, lives with primary progressive MS and his work has been profiled by Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Oprah, and others, and was presented by Jason at the White House in 2015. 

These are the Times That Try Men's Souls

 

pandemic

I borrowed the title of this post from Thomas Paine, one of the most influential activists during the American Revolution.

I held off writing about the current pandemic because the amount of information we're ingesting changes so quickly. My usual positive slant on life and living with MS won't cut it this time. What we're facing now is scary and unprecedented in modern times.

My focus remains the same, to educate, inspire and empower you as much as possible. And if there's one thing I hope you come away with after reading this post (despite it being so cliché) is that we really are in this together.

It's our responsibility to not only help ourselves right now but also help others whenever we can.

pandemic

It's an anxious time to be alive with the rampant spread of coronavirus affecting our world. The growing number of people testing positive, many losing the battle, turns normal everyday stress completely on its ear.

Now it's a whole new ballgame. I think from here on in we'll be referring to our lives in terms of of pre-virus and post-virus.

Disputes on who's responsible for COVID-19 or what steps should have been put into place prior to it seem senseless right now. Our main focus is fighting the monster that's destroying thousands upon thousands of lives, and following mandates to stay home, practice physical distancing, and washing our hands often to "flatten (or crush) the curve."

The World Health Organization (WHO)  recommends the following:

Here's a good video to learn how to properly wash your hands:

And an excellent video on safely unpacking grocery items at home during coronavirus:

 

Here are a few extra precautions for people living with MS:

 

Mental Health

It's common to feel a range of emotions in light of the virus. Fear, anxiety, depression, and sadness can hit you like a ton of bricks and there's nothing wrong in admitting this is happening to you. Join the club! We're living in unchartered territory so go easy on yourself if your mental health is off-kilter. If you find it's uncontrollable more often than not consider seeking professional help from a qualified therapist via Skype, Zoom, FaceTime, etc.

Here's an informative resource and information guide from The National Alliance of Mental Illness (NAMI) and a link to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) information sheet on stress and coping during COVID-19. I urge you to take a look at both.

Here are 5 quick tips to protect your mental health from UC San Diego Health:

Ways to Help Others

I found this article from The Idealist filled with great ideas (including links) on how to help others throughout the pandemic. During World War II citizens provided supplies to American and Allied troops by contributing to the war effort through rationing consumer goods, recycling materials, purchasing war bonds, and working in war industries.

This is our World War II. Here's a list of nine ways The Idealist advises we can help one another:

Check on your neighbors.
Explore ways to connect and volunteer virtually.
Waste not, want not (as in shopping for necessities.)
Give blood.
Make a donation.
Be a Leader.
Find your local mutual-aid network.
Remember those who are still out there on the front lines.
Take care of yourself!

Some Self Care Videos

We need to continue taking care of our bodies as we hunker down in quarantine. Here are a few videos to make it easier for you:

To wrap this up here's something I wrote this weekend and shared on social media. I pray the virus never pays you or your loved ones a visit, and that you're safe at home with people you love. Now more than ever we need each other. Blessings to you, always. Namaste.

It's an anxious time.
A time that tests our faith.
And the truths we tell ourselves.
So feed yourself with love. Buckets full of love.
❇️
We need to stay aware of what's going on around us.
And heed advice from experts in medicine and science.
❇️
Turn inwardly to discover what feeds your soul and act on it.
You don't need to be constantly productive.
Like cleaning every closet, writing a first novel or working diligently on a daily planner.
❇️
Trust your instincts.
Weed out inner chatter.
Keep the faith.
Stay strong.
Eat healthy.
Lean on others.
Call someone you haven't spoken to in awhile.
Plan a Zoom call with old friends.
Check in on the elderly, immunocompromised or those feeling lonely.
Take a physical distancing walk.
Snuggle with pets.
Watch a good movie.
Listen to music.
Read a good book.
Journal.
Meditate.
❇️
Stay well. The world needs you.

How to Fight SAD in the Fall and Winter Seasons

It’s that time of year again, when the days get shorter and the changing seasons place people at a higher risk for SAD, or seasonal affective disorder. According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) SAD is a type of depression that waxes and wanes with the seasons and typically disappears when spring and summer arrives.

{There are several ways to combat SAD that I will list at the end of this post.}

SAD

There are other contributing factors to SAD that are particular to the chronic illness community. 

Despite the beauty of changing leaves and the magic of freshly fallen snow, I’m tired of living in colder temperatures. I’ve been talking about moving to warmer weather for so long that I sound like a broken record. The problem boils down to finding a job elsewhere for my husband. We are boomers, so that's easier said than done.

Starting with a dream I had about palm trees when I was 10, after my first visit to Florida, I’ve longed to live where I could see them each day. All year I could be brightened by the sight of beautiful tropical flowers and the sounds of birds and crickets. That would make me happy.

Very happy. At long last.

SAD

Do you agree with my reasons for disliking fall and winter, mostly due to my MS?  

As promised here are a few ways you can try to beat SAD this fall and winter according to a CNN article “Helpful Tips to Combat Those Seasonal Blues” (Allen Kim, November 3, 2019):

Life is a gift and we should make the most of it. Chronic illness can sideline us but we must soldier on as best as we possibly can. If there's an opportunity to manage what’s in our control, I’d say it’s well worth the try, don’t you? 

Life keeps throwing me stones. And I keep finding the diamonds.
– Ana Claudia Antunes  

NOTE: Please seek advice from a qualified therapist if your struggles with SAD last days at a time or if you feel you need extra help. Don't go it alone.

 

 

You Are Enough Exactly As You Are

After speaking with several people in the multiple sclerosis community who were experiencing a particularly difficult year I wondered what I could do to help them. Their self-esteem was plummeting and they were questioning their place in the world. Despite several constructive conversations, it occurred to me they are enough exactly as they are. 

Simplistic, I know, but very powerful.

I sat down and wrote the following for them. It must have hit a nerve because it drew a lot of attention throughout social media. And not only from those living with MS.

Can you guess why?

No one escapes this life without facing hurdles. We all have struggles and sometimes they feel insurmountable. On those days we need someone to remind us that we are perfect just as we are. 

That includes YOU. Yes, YOU!

speaking

Living with a disability can sometimes make you less productive than you want to be.

You are enough.

You set personal and professional goals that aren't realized whenever illness strikes. You feel frustrated, angry or disappointed.

You are enough.

The life you planned and the life you're living are not in alignment. The route veered off the moment you were diagnosed.

You are enough.

You watch others live a seemingly rich, full life and wonder why you were chosen to live a lifetime of adversity.

The answer is very simple. You are as tough as nails. You are special. You are unique and a true warrior. Your inner strength knows no bounds. It might not always feel that way. Some days you'd rather feel less unique, but you are always one amazing champion.

You are a survivor. Whoever you are and whatever you do on this crazy journey of ours...

You are always enough.

speaking

 

How We Can Lean On Communities To Help Us Survive Difficult Times

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the word “communities” and the important role they play in our lives. A "community" is a place where like-minded people come together, but the plural "communities" are different in nature. They can support many of our needs to be active and informed, help us find comfort and advice, or simply be a safe place to fall.

In the current world climate having many communities to lean on is critical for good physical and mental health.

communities

Think about it. When you’re sad, scared or lonely where do you turn? When you’re looking to network with others where do you go? When illness strikes who do you turn to for support and guidance? When you feel helpless or angry who listens to your outcry?

Communities filled with empathetic people are a critical resource.

I remember thinking about communities in a new way when the junior United States Senator Barack Obama announced his presidential candidacy in early 2007. I read about the work he did in the early 1980’s as a community organizer in the poorer neighborhoods of the South Side of Chicago. I never thought much about community organizers and was curious to learn more.

What I learned was that being a community organizer provides someone with a feeling of commitment and purpose while helping those in need. 

In a New York Times articleObama’s Organizing Years, Guiding Others and Finding Himself” (July 7, 2008) we learn that Obama worked tirelessly to help a multicultural, lower income neighborhood wrestle with tough issues like asbestos removal, public safety, and employment. He faced many obstacles and wasn’t always successful in finding resolutions, but in the end he formed a lifelong commitment to a community he loves.

I grew up in a tight-knit community where neighbors helped neighbors. Children played outside until dark, and parents kept their doors unlocked in case a child was thirsty, needed a bathroom, or had a problem.

Today we live in a world that clearly needs stronger communities, but I see them crumbling all around us. We’re being pitted one against the other in ways I never imagined.

It’s a challenging time to be alive.

But I’m an optimist who still believes there are more good people in the world than bad, more kindness than evil and more hope than despair.

There are naysayers, of course. But I see communities of people spring into action when a hurricane hits and people and animals are in need. Government resources are stretched, so communities pitch in to help in countless ways.

I hold on to thoughts of hope to help me survive. They inspire me to rise above the anger that's been distorting my view of what I want for the world and for myself. Given the choice of tossing platitudes to the wind or clinging to them, I’ll always choose the latter.

Anxiety and frustration are so palpable these days that so many of us begin to suffer physical and emotional stress. That’s when I look to my mentors, the people who inspire and encourage me by who they are and what they do.

A great example of a mentor who created a community of inclusion and understanding was Fred Rogers of educational television fame. Rogers was a larger-than-life mentor who is featured in a new documentary on his life called “Won’t You Be My Neighbor?”

I’ve always admired the goodness and compassion of Mr. Rogers and find comfort in one particular memory he shared years ago :

“My mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers — so many caring people in this world.”

I have many other mentors, but that’s not what this piece is about. It’s about communities and the need to create your own to help you live a balanced, joyful, informed and peaceful life.

Here are some of the communities I look to for strength, hope, and joy. They are varied and unique to my needs:

What communities do you rely on? Who listens to your thoughts and ideas? Who inspires you? Where do you turn for the information you need or the empowerment you seek? Who keeps you sane, balanced or joyful? Who comforts you when you're feeling depressed or anxious? I'd love to hear about it!

 

 

 

 

What Did The Scale Say To Me?

This week was different.  This week the scale didn't move.  It didn't go up. It didn't go down. This week the number stayed the same.  My reaction?

scale

At least I didn't gain any weight.

I always thought stress was a bad thing, and in my craziness I'd reach out for a quick antidote for calm by eating something sinful. At least that's how I used to think about stress before I watched this TED Talk from psychologist Kelly McGonigal. She argues that stress is our friend. And now I agree. Stress forces us to face our anxieties and, as Kelly says, "This is my body helping me rise to this challenge." Take a look.  You'll never think about stress the same way again. And next time you reach for that donut, remember what Kelly said.

This week was crazy, and I didn't have time to do much exercise. What a ridiculous excuse! Okay, I did walk a lot of steps the day I was in Manhattan, and I also ran around to many appointments.  But, c'mon, driving around New Jersey isn't exactly exercise. The problem has always been that I go in and out of being totally committed to a daily exercise program. Now that I've lost some weight I want to keep it off, so no more excuses! Maybe I should find my old Jane Fonda video, dust off my leg warmers and pop the tape into the VCR.  Oh, wait, I don't have a VCR (or the leg warmers.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNPdBnlOK_U

When people ask me what would be the first thing I'd do if they found a cure for MS, I always say, "Run." One of my fondest childhood memories is running.  Running down the street, around the playground, or alongside my friends.  It's so joyful, so pure, and you feel free. If I could run again, feeling my legs blindly carry me wherever I wanted to go, that would be my Utopia. For now I'll keep walking, despite the MS fatigue and numbness.  Because my abilities are what makes me strong and full of life and oh-so-joyful.  Take a look at the faces of these children from Save the Children and you'll understand what I mean.

Next week, when I step onto the scale at Jenny Craig, I hope the numbers will change. Because this week I'm busy making friends with my stress, adding steps to my day and embracing who I am.

abilities running weight scale

*I received a free month on the Jenny Craig program and a discount on food for this review.  There was no compensation.  All opinions are solely my own.  NOTE: Clients following the Jenny Craig program lose, on average, 1 -2 pounds per week.

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Facing Life's Challenges: Finding Your Inner Strength

Candle Meditation Tranquility Peace

"Happiness is a choice. You can choose to be happy. There's going to be stress in life, but it's your choice whether you let it affect you or not." ~Valerie Bertinelli 

My cousin always tells me things happen how they are supposed to.  I believe that's true.  Things happen for a reason, and because they do, I’ve often contemplated what “the big picture is.”  I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I’ll never know what the Big Plan is from the Person Upstairs.  So I sit back and let it all play out.  

Sometimes life throws us a curve, and we must face them as best as possible.  Without the curves, we’d never recognize the beauty.  Yet the curves can be tough ones to handle.  They can make us feel sad, anxious, or fearful.   We can feel lost in their midst and reach around to find some solid footing again.

Our spirit is tested during times of adversity. Will we wither and spin out of control or rely on our inner strength to pull us through?

Here are some ways I've found to help me during difficult and stressful times:

 How do you handle stress and the challenges in your life?

___________________________________________

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DISCLAIMER:  Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are journalistic and not instead of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from using this blog or any data or links provided.

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