Are You Interested In Winning Eight Award Winning #Books?

I don't want to move out of our home. I don't want a stranger taking care of MY peonies. I don't want to live the rest of my days without the quiet, peaceful woods of our property. I don't want to leave the magic our family created in this house.

I don't want to let go.

I feel like a child about to throw a tantrum. Shall I hold my breath, cover my ears and scream at the top of my lungs?

Downsizing is our new mantra and that means I have to part with things that we either don't need or use. The problem with that is I'm overly sentimental and become attached to things. As a child I was often told I was sensitive, a word that made me angry, sending shivers down my spine.

I despise labels but particularly that one.

Today I realize that being sensitive and sentimental are what makes me uniquely ME, and that's fine. I'm okay with that. But I prefer to think of being sensitive as Edgar Allen Poe once described it:

"Beauty of whatever kind, in its supreme development, invariably excites the sensitive soul to tears." ~Edgar Allan Poe

Being sensitive and sentimental explains why I love every animal on the planet. It's why I'm in awe of cloud formations in a cerulean sky and find beauty in the rise and ascent of the sun on the horizon.

It also explains why I long for summer because I can once again hear a choir of crickets harmonizing with owls and woodpeckers.

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I'm also sensitive and sentimental about people, places and things. There's nothing wrong with that. As a writer it serves me well. But, and this is a big but, if you're making drastic life changes your heart takes a beating.

The advice I'm usually given from well-meaning people in my life are typical platitudes (one door opens, life is all about change, look at this as your next great adventure) that don't help one bit.

Your heart feels heavy and no platitude is going to lighten the load.

So every piece of beautiful bone china gathering dust in our basement, each piece of yellowed scrap paper neatly tucked away with scribblings from my son and newly found Beanie Babies hidden under a pile of baby books are all tugging at my heart.

What do I do with them? (The scribblings definitely stay...)

Then there are my beloved books. We have a library filled with them. They are my prized possessions.

To borrow a line from Shakespeare, books are the stuff as dreams are made on.

My contribution to our library includes books that were required reading in college such as Shakespeare, James Joyce, Chaucer and Edith Wharton. Weary and yellowed I love these old friends and will never part with them.

I have textbooks from the health advocacy course I took for my certification. Those are part of my permanent collection.

The remainder of my library consists of books passed down from my mother, ones from my days as a member of various book clubs and those I chose for myself.

“Do not read, as children do, to amuse yourself, or like the ambitious, for the purpose of instruction. No, read in order to live.” ~Gustave Flaubert

But I have to start drawing the line of what's moving with me, so I chose 8 books to include in a book giveaway. Here's your chance to call them your own.

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Wedding Night by Sophie Kinsella#1 New York Times bestselling author Sophie Kinsella returns with her trademark blend of sparkling wit and playful romance in this page-turning story of a wedding to remember—and a honeymoon to forget.
 
Lottie just knows that her boyfriend is going to propose, but then his big question involves a trip abroad—not a trip down the aisle. Completely crushed, Lottie reconnects with an old flame, and they decide to take drastic action. No dates, no moving in together, they’ll just get married . . . right now. Her sister, Fliss, thinks Lottie is making a terrible mistake, and will do anything to stop her. But Lottie is determined to say “I do,” for better, or for worse.

Three Junes by Julia GlassAn astonishing first novel that traces the lives of a Scottish family over a decade as they confront the joys and longings, fulfillments and betrayals of love in all its guises.

The First Warm Evening of the Year: A Novel by Jamie M. SaulFollowing his extraordinary debut novel, Light of Day (“An exhilarating emotional roller-coaster ride” —Washington Post), author Jamie Saul now explores the intricate relationships between friends and siblings, husbands and wives.

Jana Bibi's Excellent Fortunes: A Novel by Betsy WoodmanMeet Jana Bibi, a Scottish woman helping to save the small town in India she has grown to call home and the oddball characters she considers family.

Skink No Surrender by Carl HiaasenCarl Hiaasen serves up his unique brand of swamp justice in the New York Times bestseller Skink—No Surrender. (A National Book Award Longlist Selection)
 
When your cousin goes missing under suspicious circumstances, who do you call? There’s only one man for the job: a half-crazed, half-feral, one-eyed ex-governor named Skink.

Glitter and Glue: A Memoir by Kelly CorriganFrom the author of "The Middle Place" comes a new memoir that examines the bond—sometimes nourishing, sometimes exasperating, occasionally divine—between mothers and daughters.

Angle of Repose: Wallace StegnerAn American masterpiece and iconic novel of the West by National Book Award and Pulitzer Prize winner Wallace Stegner—a deeply moving narrative of one family and the traditions of our national past.

Lookaway, Lookaway by Wilton Barnhardt: Steely and formidable, Jerene Jarvis Johnston sits near the apex of society in contemporary Charlotte, North Carolina, where old Southern money and older family skeletons meet the new wealth of bankers, land speculators, and social climbers. Jerene and her Civil War reenactor husband, Duke, have four adult children―sexually reckless real estate broker Annie; earnest minister Bo; gay-but-don't-tell-anyone Joshua; and naive, impressionable college freshman Jerilyn. Jerene's brother, Gaston, is an infamously dissolute novelist and gossip who knows her secrets and Duke's; while her sister, Dillard, is a reclusive prisoner of her own unfortunate choices. When a scandal threatens the Johnston family's status and dwindling finances, Jerene swings into action...and she will stop at nothing to keep what she has and preserve her legacy. Wilton Barnhardt's Lookaway, Lookaway is a headlong, hilarious narrative of a family coming apart on the edge of the old South and the new, and an unforgettable woman striving to hold it together.

Here's your chance to enter to win these incredible books by leaving a comment below and tweeting the following tweet. The contest ends Tuesday, September 6 at midnight and the winner will be notified by email.

Sorry, only those living in the U.S. can enter to win.

[Tweet "Enter for your chance to win 8 incredible #books Contest ends September 6. "]

Good luck!

NOTE: All book descriptions are from Amazon.com.

 

 

Leaving Home And Beginning A New Chapter Of Our Lives

We’re getting ready to move from the home we built twenty-one years ago. It’s time to downsize, time to begin a new path by stepping forward into the next chapter of our lives.

path journey chapter

I’m having a hard time with this.

There are many reasons, from sweet to melancholy, why I'm having trouble with the idea of leaving our home for good. I’ve imagined a sleepless night before daybreak comes, forcing me to face the last time I’ll ever walk around inside of what will always be MY home. It will never truly belong to anyone else.

I’ll be leaving behind a piece of my heart.

path journey chapterI know that a house is just a "thing" and that family, friends and good health are what matters most.

But my heart still aches.

I live in a house with two men, a house filled to the brim with testosterone where much of the conversation revolves around sports, business and politics. I don't mind discussing those subjects because they interest me as well. But women, well, women like to discuss feelings and every little minutiae of the day.

I don’t think they truly understand my deep emotional attachment to our house.

They are ready to move on, and are even a bit excited about it. I know intellectually it’s time to go, but my sentimental soul causes my heart to ache. Here’s why:

Another door closes: Once we move, another chapter of our lives is over. We were starry-eyed with our 16-month-old son when we finally closed and moved into our new home. We painstakingly planned the interior and exterior of it, and moving in was a joyous day. We were at the beginning of a new journey, and now we are at the end of that road.

Landscaping: Growing up my father planned and planted all of the landscaping around my childhood home. With our new home he envisioned another chance to use his gardening skills. We were willing recipients. He planted with love, so it will be difficult for me to say goodbye to his handiwork. Nature is for the ages, and others will benefit from his work for years to come. Yet I know that when we pull away for the last time, I’ll want to kiss every peony, each shrub and all of the daffodils he lovingly planted.

All grown up: There weren’t many houses on our street when we moved in, so miles of woods surrounded us. My son and I spent a lot of quality time outdoors, with birds or turkeys looking on as we explored our new surroundings. He went from a Little Tykes sedan to entering college in what seemed like a span of 5 minutes. Gone are the little boy playgroups scuffing our wood floors and Halloween apple-dunking parties in our basement. Today when I look around I still picture him playing and being his happy self. I think to myself, “That’s where we let the butterflies go free” from the box we bought at Zany Brainy, or “That’s the rock he sat on while waiting for dad to come home.”

path journey chapter

A house filled with toys and boys. A love of cars and cellphones started early on..

Nature: I will miss being surrounded by nature, and getting my hands dirty in the soil to plant pots of spring flowers or trying to copy the English garden I saw in The White Flower Farm catalogue. I love being outside and the fresh smell of our cut grass, dirt, flowers and, yes, even fertilizer. Every tree, every blade of grass on our property feels like it belongs only to me. I know that sounds crazy, but go ahead and argue with my heart.

path journey chapter

We visited The White Flower Farm in Litchfield, Connecticut to get landscaping ideas.

Loved Ones: My brothers and I have five boys between us, and we took turns hosting parties for birthdays and holidays while they grew up. We are blessed the cousins grew up together, and, as fine young men, are still good friends.

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Family parties were always fun for the five boy cousins

We also hosted parties for my husband’s side of the family who live far away. I become wistful thinking about his grandparents, my son’s great-grandparents, who lived to be 92 and 100 years old. They were extraordinary people, and we felt blessed when they'd fly north to spend time with us in our home.

path journey chapter

Pets: At the urging of our then 9-year-old son, we adopted our first cat. Since then we’ve adopted three more. One of them was a feral that nuzzled against our window for days, obviously the product of a thoughtless owner who misplaced him or let him go. The four years with him wouldn’t have happened if we lived elsewhere. Blessings.

I am a spiritual person, so I am working hard on processing the advice friends have given to me:

My heart is still aching. I am a work in progress.

Have you ever experienced a difficult time transitioning from one chapter of your life to another?

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Ice Cream For Dinner? That Was Then And This Is Now

I clearly remember one extraordinarily stressful day while I was working in Manhattan in the early 1980's. I was living on my own, and on the way home I stopped by a local convenience store to pick up a quart of Sedutto's chocolate ice cream.  While on the bus home I decided that one of the advantages of living alone was that you could eat anything you wanted, at any time of day, and no one else would know about it but you.

Ice Cream Healthier Eating

Photograph: Mark Andersen/Getty Images/Rubberball

There's a saying people jokingly throw around that if you eat in the dark, no one can see you so there are no calories in the food you eat.

That goes for eating alone, too. Let me tell you from experience: it isn't true.

I ate an entire quart of ice cream for dinner, scarfing it down while thinking that with every bite it would erase my stress.

SPOILER ALERT: It didn't help.

I was in my twenties and never worried about cholesterol levels or how much fat was in a serving. I ate for pleasure, attended weekly aerobic classes, and I'm sure I walked at least 10,000 steps a day getting around Manhattan.

Healthier Eating Ice Cream

That was then.  This is now.

These days, I have to watch everything I eat.  I must consider cholesterol levels and how much my daily fat intake is. And I definitely don't walk 10,000 steps a day.

I also worry about genetics, and how to work on beating the ones I inherited.

And then there's stress.  My personal stress has been high lately. Believe me when I tell you I've been dying for a quart of some delicious chocolate ice cream, dripping with hot fudge.

This past weekend we went out with some friends to our favorite Chinese restaurant.  I love this particular place because, aside from not using any MSG (I know when restaurants use it; I feel as if I'm having a heart attack when my heart races a mile a minute), they also offer a healthy menu.

I ordered the baked tofu with ginger, garlic and vegetables with brown rice, and shared some other dishes as well.  I love that tofu dish, and always look forward to it.

Then we took a walk downtown.  It's a quaint town with lovely little shops and a mix of ethnic restaurants.  I was excited to finally have a chance to be outdoors after the winter from hell we're experiencing has kept us indoors for a l-o-n-g time.

Ah, fresh air.

Then we walked past a Cold Stone Creamery. It's never been my favorite ice cream, but the smell of the ice cream, plus those M&M's that were yelling screaming at me to try them, was a true test.

I passed.  I kept thinking about the progress I've been making at Jenny Craig, and how delicious their Triple Chocolate Cheesecake would taste when I got home..

I replaced my desire for M&M's with the thought of a healthier choice, and the knowledge that I wanted to continue my journey of healthier eating.

One baby step at a time, I am trying to reach my personal goals of looking and feeling better.  That's all I can ask of myself: one day at a time.

What are you doing to be a healthier eater?

*I received a free month on the Jenny Craig program, and a discount on food for this review.  There was no compensation.  All opinions are solely my own.  NOTE: Clients following the Jenny Craig program lose, on average, 1 -2 lbs. per week.

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The Importance of Nurturing Our Friendships

Real or fictional portrayals of friendships between women have always had a uniquely powerful impact on me.  Believe it or not, when I watched re-runs of I Love Lucy as a child, I looked past the comedy and was delighted to see the solid friendship between Lucy Ricardo and Ethel Mertz.

That sparked something in me to hope I’d someday have friendships forever.

Lucy and Ethel.  Mary and Rhoda.  Emily and Charlotte.  Serena and Venus.  

As a pre-teen, watching The Mary Tyler Moore Show’s comedic yet poignant relationship between Mary and Rhoda strengthened my love of strong, forever friendships.  They were always having so much fun (and I loved Rhoda's clothes and the fact that Mary never minded them.  Especially the groovy crocheted vests and funky headscarves.)

Meg, Jo, Elizabeth, and Amy March

I always yearned for a sisterly relationship like Lucy's one with Ethel.

I know, I know – it’s fiction!  But writers base their stories on real life, including how women bond with one another,  showing support and compassion despite any stupid, idiotic, exciting, or wonderful thing they may do.

Gloria Steinem and Bella Abzug   Shiprah and Puah (Old Testament)

I have been blessed with two such friendships.  I met my two best friends – identical twins - when we were ten years old.  As identical twins, they, of course, look the same. I treasure them individually for who they are and what they separately mean to me.

Together, they are my sisters.  The ones who have weathered the storm of peer pressure, boyfriends, proms, college, first jobs, marriage, children, and menopause.

We are our true selves when we chat with each other.

We live all over the map, yet I know that on any given day if I call one of them, we can pick up where we last left off.  We are each other’s cheering section and a shoulder to cry on if we need one.

They ground me.

If people go through life with at least one best friend, they can consider themselves lucky.  I’ve been lucky twice, and I never take it for granted.

Dorothy Zbornak, Sophia Petrillo, Blanche Devereaux & Rose Nyland    

True friendship must have three distinct qualities: honesty, trust, and loyalty.

You can have casual friends who may or may not have all of these qualities, yet you share a commonality that enables you to enjoy certain activities together.  One friend may strictly be your tennis buddy; another frequents museums with you.

Thelma and Louise   Mystic Pizza   Steel Magnolias   Stage Door

Over the years, I've learned some hard lessons with some friendships.  These lessons were difficult.  Friends who proclaim they are your friend, yet you don't hear from them despite all of your best efforts.

Others say they miss spending time with you and will call soon.  They never do.

Still, others are fun to be with, yet despite your best efforts, they make little effort to contact you again.

I’ve felt hurt, betrayed, disappointed, and sad.  I’ve questioned myself and whether I said something wrong or wondered whether it was a flaw within me.

I finally learned a very important lesson that comes from the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.  It says:

Be impeccable with your word. Don't take anything personally. Don't make assumptions. Always do your best.” 

It would be wonderful to have a Lucy or a Mary live next door to share a cup of coffee, chatting the hours away.  It would be lovely to have everyone treat you with dignity and honesty.

“Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.” ~Virginia Woolf

I've learned that people come into our lives for a reason, and they leave them for a reason as well.

The truth is that life is as imperfect as we are.  What is important is that to live a good quality life, we must take the time to tend to our true friendships and our health. 

The quality of our friendships affects our health. That is the best reason of all to tend to our friendships.

(See the article at Mayo Clinic on how friendships enrich your life and improve your health.)  

“A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still, gently allows you to grow.” ~William Shakespeare

Do you tend to your friendships?

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