A Spotlight On Seven Wonderful Ways To Stay Healthy When You Travel

There are times in our professional lives when we hear of an event that's of interest to us yet we're forced to consider the impact of work and travel on our health. This post addresses those concerns. Although I mention the disability community the following tips are for anyone living with any health issue.

A year after I began to blog I decided to step out of my comfort zone by signing up for my first blogging conference. I was excited at the prospect of meeting other midlife bloggers I’d met online. But I also felt extremely anxious. The conference was being held at a large venue and I’d need to take shuttles between my hotel and the event. To someone living with a disability who tries to stay as healthy as possible this can seem daunting.

If your legs decide you’ve had enough before your brain catches up you’re forced to decide between having fun and learning (and risking a flareup) versus resting and feeling frustrated and alone.

I worked hard on planning the logistics of my trip before I left home. I wanted to keep up with the rigorous schedule of the agenda and my friends. But I also wanted to be wise about the choices I’d make.

A little pre-planning goes a long way.

I wrote two posts about attending professional events for anyone living with a health issue. The first one was published on the BlogHer website about attending BlogHer 2013 and the second one was written after the event.

The time has come to plan again. In a few months I’ll be attending another large event. I'm thrilled to be invited, for the second year, to The Consortium of Multiple Sclerosis Center’s annual meeting as their official blogger.

Photo Credit: Consortium of Multiple Sclerosis Centers

The flight to Washington DC will be shorter than the flight to last year’s venue in Indianapolis, but once again I’ll need to hit the ground running.

There will be press conferences, interviews, keynote addresses, educational offerings and exhibits to attend while also having an opportunity to interact with the world’s top doctors, nurses and researchers. This is all quite an honor.

I need to be on top of my game. That means researching the layout of the venue, pre-planning logistics based on the agenda and making sure I’m as healthy as possible.

Here’s seven tips on attending a large conference:

Call the hotel – It’s important to check the layout of the hotel. Most layouts can be found on the venue's website.
I also call the hotel directly to request a quiet room close to the elevator (less steps).
Ask for the top floor. If you have sleep issues this helps to limit the amount of noise coming from the room above.
Ask for an accessible room if one is available, and inform them if you have a service animal.
Ask about self-operating lifts to their pool and if they have an accessible spa entrance. Find out the quickest route to various events.
Preview the Agenda – It’s necessary to check the agenda before you leave home to plan your day. Using a daily planner to map it out is quite helpful. Be sure to earmark enough time to rest. Make plans within your abilities and don’t over-do it. Be sensible about what you’re able to do.
De-Stress – Stress can be a factor when traveling. Getting to and from airports and hotels, fulfilling your professional responsibilities while you’re there and maintaining good health during your stay can create anxiety. Learning how to b-r-e-a-t-h-e is an important key toward reducing stress. I meditate five minutes every day. I find it relaxing and restorative. Look for an empty room or closed off area, close your eyes and focus on your mantra. If you want to learn more about meditation click here. Here are a few other ways to help you de-stress.
Fatigue – This is a big one for me. No matter how much I sleep I never feel refreshed. My body informs me when I need to rest. When I’m at a conference I either go to my room or find a quiet area to relax. Listen to your body. It knows your needs.
Learn to say NO – I’m fortunate to be affiliated with people at CMSC who understand my disease and tell me to GO REST! Learning to say no can help you stay healthy. Turn down that invitation to a late night cocktail party. Say no to attending every forum on the agenda. Use that time to relax and re-energize.
Go easy on yourself – No matter how much you prepare for your trip sometimes your body is uncooperative. If this happens be gentle on yourself. If you miss an event it can be disappointing. Instead of having a pity party reward yourself for making a wise choice.
Take a warm bath. Read a good book. Have a piece of dark chocolate. Call a friend.
It's not worth being upset about what you can't control. What you can control is your perspective.
Someone once told me to envision placing my troubles into a big bubble and flicking it away. Powerful and it feels so good!
Ask for Help: There was a tremendous amount walking at the BlogHer conference. My legs buckled and I almost fell. Fortunately there was an exhibit for a mattress company and the exhibitors allowed me to lie on a mattress until I regained my strength.
Conclusion? If you’re not feeling well speak up, ask for help, and take care of yourself. People are more understanding than you think. There’s no shame in getting help from others.

Having a health issue doesn’t have to stop you from attending professional events. Sometimes it’s simply a matter of learning what works or doesn't work for you. Once you know it’s possible it becomes your new normal.

The Magic of #GivingTuesday And The Healing Powers Of Horses

This is the first in a two part series for #GivingTuesday (December 2).

I'm proud to be a social media ambassador for #GivingTuesday (December 2) for the second year in row. We have a day of thanks, Black Friday and Cyber Monday. #GivingTuesday is a global event, and a chance for everyone to make a choice to help others.

Please take a look at this video for a quick explanation of what #GivingTuesday is.

I'm using the power of my words, along with the help of social media, to create awareness about an extraordinary organization that rescues, rehabilitates and matches horses with people.

The Full Circle Equine Rehabilitation Center is where "horses and people help each other." Its Founder, Cris Pemberton, helps semi-retired horses and ponies find their purpose by spending quality time with people who care and love them. Cris, along with the help of many passionate volunteers, finds that, "the healing power of horses can touch, uplift and enrich the community."

But the cost of caring for a horse is expensive, and many times she's forced to turn down requests to take in horses who are old or physically/emotionally damaged. It breaks her heart to have to say no. If she had enough funds to say yes she'd be able to rescue and rehabilitate more and more beautiful horses.

Volunteers at Full Circle with the beautiful horse, Cayenne

Cris firmly believes in her mission of helping people in her community discover the magic of horses and therapeutic riding. She loves teaching others the proper skills of working with the rehabilitation and rescue programs offered at FCERC.

Through the help of generous donations from friends, family and the community Cris implemented a small scholarship program that grants one person at a time into the FCERC program.

Cris with Faith

But without the continued support of donations these programs can't exist. Horses won't be rescued and the community won't receive the gift of healing from these beautiful animals.

The beautiful Angel

Please take a look at the Full Circle Equine Rehabilitation Center website for more details about FCERC's programs to find out how you can help.

I'd like to thank Cris for the special work she is doing, and for reaching out to me through the #GivingTuesday website. It has been an honor to get to know her and FCERC.

IMPORTANT INFORMATION: FCERC is incorporated in Washington State and is registered with the Washington State Charities Registry. Our Application for Recognition of Exemption under Section 501(c) 3 of the Internal Revenue Code was approved on July 31, 2014 effective February 26, 2013. FCERC is a Public Charity and, as such, contributions to FCERC are deductible. We are also qualified to receive tax deductible bequests, devises, transfers or gifts under section 2055, 2016 or 2522 of the Code.

Photo Credits: Photos of the horses are the sole property of Full Circle Equine Rehabilitation Center.

My Anniversary, A Few Truths And One Great Big Fat Lie

I'm always up for something fun, especially since I'm almost in the homestretch of NaBloPoMo. So I was more than happy when the lovely Elin Stebbins Waldal of Beyond the Backyard Blues invited me and a few of my blogging buddies to play a game that begins today.

But I wasn't sure if I wanted to participate because, you see, today is my 26th wedding anniversary. The day I walked down the aisle and exchanged vows under the chuppah with my best friend.

Our journey together has been like most marriages, filled with ups and downs that, in the end, has drawn us closer together. I cherish my husband and our life together, and the way he makes me feel beautiful and valued each and every day.

The icing on our cake was the birth of our incredible son who is the joy of our lives. Together the three of us are a team, and I am mindful every day how blessed we truly are.

Now back to the game. I am going to write 5 truths and 1 lie about myself and you must decide which one is the lie. Can you spot it? Leave your comments below, and tomorrow I will reveal the answer.

A married man once asked me to be his mistress, and if I said yes he said he would rent an apartment to be our cozy little love nest.
I asked former New York City Mayor Ed Koch to lower the city's taxes.
I had a chef bake a specialty cake for me, then told my date that I baked it.
Billy Crystal asked me if I grew up in a family where we had two sets of dishes, one for dairy and one for meat.
I love flying in small airplanes. Our honeymoon was in Little Dix Bay on the island of Virgin Gorda. We flew to Puerto Rico, then took a tiny plane to the island. It was exhilarating.
I worked on an assembly line in a factory where my job was to place a tiny widget on top of every appliance that rolled by on a conveyor belt.

Sharing My Writing Process

When I first read my friend Connie McLeod's question asking whether I'd be interested in joining a group of blogger friends to answer the question, "What is your writing process?" my first reaction was to laugh. Why?

I ~~don't think I have~~ don't have an actual writing process.

But I do love talking about writing, and I also enjoy learning from others about their process. So I thought I'd dive, head first, into shaky waters to perhaps discover what my process is. Let's see what we find!

WHY DO I WRITE WHAT I DO?

I write to marry two things I love: writing and advocacy. I've always loved to write but never had enough time for it. When I entered my fifties I thought it was time to make room for my passions. I thought I'd begin by writing about myself and the world around me, to use my voice through the written word.

As a child I was very shy, and to some extent I still am. But somehow when I write, I am able to express my authentic self in ways I never imagined I'd be able to do.

One more important reason why I write what I do: After my diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis at the age of twenty-eight, I met many kind and compassionate people who showed my family and me unconditional love. Today my mission is to repay those kindnesses by paying it forward, trying to help others struggling with disability. Using my voice through writing is my way of doing this. One post at a time.

HOW DOES MY WORK DIFFER FROM OTHERS OF ITS GENRE?

Whether I'm writing about disability, midlife, wellness, animal rights, social good, movies or books, it is written from my unique point of view. That view includes my life experiences, my schticks, my likes and dislikes.

I admittedly look at the world through rose-colored glasses; it's who I am. When I write, I want my readers to look at issues through a positive lens. I enjoy bringing hope to the table, while spreading awareness, and perhaps even educating readers, without being too Pollyannaish. There's enough doom and gloom in the world. If I can make a positive difference in someone's life, I've done my job well.

HOW DOES MY WRITING PROCESS WORK?

I am a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants kind of writer. I know what I have to write for the sites I write for. I know what my deadlines are. Do I organize a schedule for myself? No. Should I? Maybe.

Yet somehow my non-process works for me. It's like when I studied for final exams. I did it at the last possible minute, pulling all-nighters with the help of a case of TAB (before my coffee loving days.)

It ~~always~~ mostly worked.

Here's my process: Every day starts with a cup of coffee while reading, liking, sharing and commenting on social media. Then I scan the days headlines, and move on to the job of writing.

I keep a list of topics I want to write about in a notebook (yes, I'm still old-school) for my paid jobs, along with clipped articles that caught my eye. Topics are mainly based on topical issues or what's trending. From time-to-time I make notes of words and phrases I like. Yes, I am a word nerd.

As for my blog posts, those topics come from thoughts that occur while taking a shower, during a walk, in the middle of a meal or after a conversation.

When I finally sit down to write, I begin by allowing the free flow of thoughts dictate what I type. When they don't flow I step away and come back to it later.

After I'm finished, I fine-tune everything by editing it a few zillion times. I am a harsh critic of my own work.

Is that the right tense? Did I phrase that correctly? Is my voice appropriate to the subject, and do the sentences make sense? Am I getting my point across?

When I am done, I must feel proud of my work or I won't hit the PUBLISH button. Good writing should not only inform someone, but should move them as well. If it doesn't move me, it's not worth sharing.

WHAT AM I WORKING ON NOW?

I'm working on several projects:

I'm trying to find a site to publish an interview I conducted with the director of a star-studded documentary called Cinemability (Ben Affleck, William H. Macy, Gary Sinise, etc.) about the portrayal of people with disabilities in film and television.
I was approached to interview Dr. George Jelinek whose recent findings from a global MS study will be published in Nutritional Neuroscience in May.
I will be paying tribute to nurses for National Nurses Week in May. I love nurses and the way they treat the whole person. I want to pay homage to them for their dedication and compassion.
My long-term goal is to finish a children's book about parents diagnosed with a disability.

Now it's time for me to pay it forward by introducing the next blogger to talk about her writing process, the ever-lovely Linda Maltz Wolff. I met Linda last summer in Chicago at BlogHer. She is a gem, and one of the sweetest people I know. Linda is the creator and writer of CarpoolGoddess.com, a website for women, where she shares the funny and poignant in everyday life. She is a frequent contributor on The Huffington Post, Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop, and What The Flicka. Linda's writing appears in the recently published humor anthology: Not Your Mother's Book On Being A Mom.

Here are links to other writers in this blog tour. Read what they had to say about their process.

Mindy Trotta
Helene Bludman
Connie McLeod
Marci Rich
Jane Gassner
Janie Emaus
Walker Thornton
Lisa Froman

Facing Our Challenges One Story At A Time (Book Review)

NOTE: I’ve been living with a disability for over 26 years. Since then I’ve heard countless ways that people try in order to feel better and overcome their challenges.

I don’t endorse any medications or any path for a person to try. I believe we each must find what works best for our own unique journey.

The following is the story of one man's journey.

One of my personal and professional goals is to change the face of disability. To change the way people look at illness, and to take a step closer toward a better understanding of the human condition.

Because of the indomitable spirit of the author of the book, "Shadow Summit: One Man, His Diagnosis, And The Road To A Vibrant Life” I decided to do a book review to illustrate a story of one person's dedication to finding answers to better health.

Photo: JonChandonnet.com

Jon Chandonnet was completing his Master’s Degree program at MIT with a promising job offer from Sapient when, at age 27, he received a shattering diagnosis.

He had Multiple Sclerosis.

But Jon didn’t have time for MS. It wasn't a part of his plan for success, and he would not let anything stand in his way.

He chose to ignore his disease. He remained in denial for six years, setting out to prove to himself, and to everyone around him at work and at home, that he didn’t have an autoimmune disease.

He ran in several marathons. He climbed mountain after mountain, some with peaks over 14,000 feet.

He thought he found his answer: keep MS at bay by running and climbing.

His family remained supportive of his choices. Until the MS finally caught up with him, and his life began to crumble.

He lost function in his limbs and was unable to keep up the fast pace at his job. His speech became affected, and he was falling down.

He began to lose hope.

The last straw happened on his wedding day, when he gathered all of his energy to finish his first dance with his lovely new bride. Barely making it through the dance, he realized his MS was beginning to win the battle.

Fortunately for Jon, his family held an intervention, showing him through tough love that he must begin paying attention to his MS.

After trying FDA approved disease-modifying medications, he decided they weren't working. Then Jon learned about the Optimum Health Institute (OHI) in San Diego where, since its opening in 1976, “over 75,000 people from around the world had visited…to improve not only their health, but also their lives.”

Jon signed up to try the Institute for one week.

Once there, he ate raw foods, drank water and Rejuvelac, became mindful of what he put into his body, and occasionally spent days fasting.

“Digestion placed a huge metabolic load on the body that was lifted when a person ate raw plant-based foods and cleansed their color. The energy used to digest enzyme-depleted, cooked food, was freed to help the body heal. Raw food meant less effort for my struggling body, and possibly resulted in more energy.”

After three weeks his body began to respond to the program, and eventually it reversed many of his MS symptoms.

The results from the program were amazing, and he learned a new mantra that he planned on living by for the rest of his life:

Mind, Body, Spirit and Emotion

Paying attention to these four areas would help him achieve his dreams of professional and financial success.

I would recommend this book to anyone who enjoys inspirational books, and for people looking for a new way to look at disease. I found it a little long-winded at times, but generally it was a quick and interesting read.

Read more of Jon’s book to learn about the rest of his incredible journey. (Book release date is November 2013. It will be available on Amazon.com)

END NOTE: For anyone faced with a physical challenge, find what works best for you. Be our own best advocate by asking questions, doing research, following your instincts and never settling for an answer unless it feels right to you.

Above all, respect and honor another person’s journey, and their successes, as you would want them to honor yours.

That is what will help us begin to change the face of disability.

What challenges have you faced?

Are You Drinking Clean Water? Enter This Contest For A Chance To Win A New Water Filter System

Disclosure: Aquasana provided me with one countertop drinking water filter system. The opinions and experiences expressed in this post are solely my own.

“The risk of disease associated with public drinking water has passed from the theoretical to the real.” ~Dr. David Ozonoff, Boston University, Leading Authority on Water Contamination

Pupils Dahery, 8 and Tiana, 8,and their friends washing their faces in the new handwashing facility of the Catholic school in the Village of Manaotaonkafa, Commune Andranomafana, Betafo District, Vakinankaratra Region, Madagascar

Earlier this year I was invited to a small gathering to learn about WaterAid and the incredible work they do to bring clean water to underdeveloped countries. (Read my post about my WaterAid meeting here)

Can you imagine being unable to wash yourself with clean water? Can you picture sanitation facilities without clean water, or no available clean water to quench your thirst?

Clean water is unavailable to 11% of the world’s population. A lack of safe sanitation results in 700,000 children dying every year, and diarrheal diseases kill 2,000 children a day.

WaterAid’s extraordinary global efforts opened my eyes to how blessed we are to have clean water at our disposal.

Til Maya Pulami, 12 and Som Maya Pulami, 11, are so happy to see the water coming from the new tap. As soon as they came back from school they started playing with the tap again. Tosramkhola, Sindhuli, Nepal

After the meeting, I gained a new appreciation for the 64 ounces of clear, fresh water I drink every day. (The worse-than-childbirth pain of passing several kidney stones a few years ago remains fresh in my mind. Drinking 8 glasses of water a day may prevent forming more stones.)

There’s nothing more refreshing than a clean tasting glass of water.

“Filtering home, tap or well water can decrease exposure to numerous known or suspected carcinogens.” ~President’s Cancer Panel Report, 2010

Enter Aquasana.

After a furiously jam-packed few days in Chicago at BlogHer this summer, I looked forward to the last (but best) party sponsored by BOOMBOX Network.

I was tired. I was excited. I was hungry.

This is what I saw when the elevator doors opened for the party.

The display was by Aquasana, a company focused on healthy living, a clean environment and an impressive water filter system providing a maximum reduction in water contaminants.

I knew I had to stop to taste-test their water. After one cup I was hooked. It tasted crisp, clean and refreshing.

I also liked the philosophy of the company. Aquasana’s CEO, Todd Bartee, is a trained environmental engineer with expertise in recycling, water and waste-water treatment. His vision is to educate the world about the importance of clean water and its effect on health and wellness.

“While much tap water is indeed risky…we conclude there is no assurance that bottled water is any safer than tap water.” ~National Resources Defense Council

Aquasana countertop water filter system

An Empowered Spirit is dedicated to empowering others during midlife, and also empowering anyone living with a disability. Espousing the virtues of clean water is an important topic for discussion. As we age we need to live an even healthier lifestyle. That lifestyle must include healthy drinking water:

Bottled water is not held to the same safety standards as tap water.
Filtered tap water is a healthier choice than bottled or tap water.
Nearly half of all bottled water sold in the United States is tap water.

Aquasana offers a countertop water filter that can transform your tap water into the same healthy, clean water I tasted in Chicago. Their system is durable, easy to install and clean, with a space saving design that includes audible and visual filter change indicators.

Installation takes only a few minutes, and it’s easy to do yourself. Filters can be changed every six months and they are recyclable (hooray for the environment!)

The Aquasana countertop water filter system includes some important features to help us stay healthy. They include:

Superior contaminant reduction including 99% of lead, herbicides, pesticides water-borne cysts, asbestos, volatile organic chemicals, and over 60 commonly occurring drinking water contaminants including chloramines.
Certified to remove over 97% chlorine.
Reduces odor and improves taste.
Preserves beneficial minerals in water such as calcium, magnesium and potassium.

Now I have some exciting news for you! You can be a lucky winner of your own Aquasana water filter system by entering the following contest. The deadline is Thursday, October 8, 2013.

To enter the contest, you simply need to do the following:

Leave a comment below.
Follow An Empowered Spirit (@CathyChes) and Aquasana (@Aquasana) on Twitter.
Like An Empowered Spirit and Aquasana on Facebook.

How much water do you drink a day?

The No-Iron Foxcroft Collection: How It Makes Life Easier For Someone With A Disability

The following is not a sponsored post. I received no compensation, other than a Foxcroft blouse as a gift for attending the BOOMBOX Network Social Soiree. The opinions expressed are solely my own.

Photo: Foxcroft website/foxcroftcollection.com

A few weeks ago I was invited by BOOMBOX Network to a cocktail party for Foxcroft, the women's apparel company. This year, they are celebrating 25 years of "effortless style".

I looked forward to learning more about their line of clothing designed with the feminine figure in mind, with fabrics and designs I always count on for a casual yet polished look. Timeless, classic and comfortable.

Arriving at Foxcroft with my fun chauffeur, Estelle Sobel Erasmus (musingsonmotherhoodmidlife.com)

After arriving at the party and getting settled in with hugs from friends and introductions to other attendees (and, of course, eating a few hors d'oevres since I was starving!) I was pleasantly surprised to learn Foxcroft also carries a men's line. Their display enticed me to look around and touch all of the soft fabrics.

Foxcroft Collection: Men's Apparel

After entering the larger and more crowded back room, I had some time to catch up with old friends and make new acquaintances. It was a lot of fun.

Midlife bloggers who are now good friends

When it was time to quiet down and learn what was new at Foxcroft, we heard about their newest arrivals, and the fabulous no-iron line they offer.

Regina of Foxcroft, modeling one of their fabulous blouses. She's a great model for their apparel.

Welcomig us was Thomas Dietrich, President of The Apparel Company, parent company of Foxcroft

Welcoming us was Thomas Dietrich, President of The Apparel Company, parent company of Foxcroft

No-iron? Music to my ears. I hate to iron (just ask my husband), and doing so is fatiguing for someone with a disability. Standing for long periods of time is difficult, so ironing is the last thing on my "to do" list.

How many times has my poor husband tried to (ahem) iron his own shirt? He doesn't love to do it (at all) but does it when he has to because he knows it makes my life easier.

No-iron? That's a dream come true.

I purchased "no-iron" clothing before, and ended up being disappointed with the product. After hearing about Foxcroft's I was cautiously optimistic.

Foxcroft no-iron blouse and tunic. Perfect for people with disabilities.

We were then invited to try on a sample no-iron blouse. As an added bonus for attending the party, we would be receiving a Foxcroft no-iron blouse (in our choice of long or 3/4 sleeve, with an array of colors to choose from.)

I was thrilled.

Before the party ended, we were treated to a goody bag filled with items from the marvelous sponsors of the party.

Plus my own private hug from friend Audrey Van Petegem of BOOMBOX Network.

More swag!

My own private hug from my sweet friend, Audrey Van Petegem of BOOMBOX Network.

I couldn't wait to receive my new shirt and try it on. Finally, the day came when my box arrived at the front door. Hallelujah!

Waiting to be worn!

The purple color of the blouse was vibrant, and the soft texture made it f-e-e-l good to wear.

Don't you love the feel of premium cotton? PLUS, there was not one wrinkle in the blouse after being shipped.

Here I am wearing it two ways. Tell me which way you prefer.

Open as a jacket,

It looks more blue in this picture. It's not!

or closed as a blouse.

This is the true color

I love my new blouse and how easy it will be to keep it looking crisp and fresh every time I wear it.

Ordering Foxcroft apparel is easy to purchase online by going to the Foxcroft website.

What do you think of the new no-iron apparel? Will it make your life easier?

Thank you to BOOMBOX Network and especially to the ever-fabulous hostess of the night, Audrey Van Petegem. I want to also thank Foxcroft, and the sponsors for this fun event:

The generous sponsors for the BOOMBOX/Foxcroft event

If Violence,Tragedy Or Illness Strike, Will You Choose To Allow Gratitude Into Your Heart?

“Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.” ~Aesop

gran-canaria-171555_1920

A friend of mine recently published a blog post on why she feels grateful about the life she leads. I enjoyed reading how her days are filled with joy and gratitude. Her accompanying photographs reveals the beauty that surrounds her, and I felt, for a brief moment, the light that emits from within her heart and soul.

I felt grateful.

“When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.” ~Willie Nelson

This week I learned of tragedies happening to some friends who live far away. Their pain was palpable as I read their pleas for prayer and good thoughts. I reflected on my life and my own daily struggles. Their pleas put my troubles into perspective.

I am grateful.

“To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant,
to enact gratitude is generous and noble,
but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven.” ~ Johannes A. Gaertner

Black arrows on left show where boardwalk used to be before Hurricane Sandy. Black arrows on right show temporary walkway.

On Sunday I spent a magical day with my husband, as we call it in New Jersey, “down the shore.” The weather was perfect without a cloud in the sky. A gentle breeze blew, keeping the heat of the sun at bay. The Jersey shore is alive and well in the wake of Hurricane Sandy. The phrase “Jersey Strong” says it all, and we benefitted from that strength. We stretched out, side-by-side, on our little corner of the beach, talking and laughing and listening to the sound of the waves.

I was grateful.

“No one is as capable of gratitude as one who has escaped the kingdom of night.” ~Elie Wiesel, accepting Nobel Peace Prize (1986)

moon-72571_1280

An Islamic group claimed responsibility for rocket fire in Israel and declared no Israeli town to be safe. Two small towns in Nigeria were victim to violent attacks by gunfire that resulted in at least 56 deaths. Violent clashes in Xinjiang (China) left 21 dead and two people were sentenced to death. These are a few of the leading stories in today’s news. Violence is everywhere. The world is a scary place. We no longer feel the comfort and safety we felt before the horrific events of 9/11. Today we are more cautious, knowing that violence happens on our own soil. These thoughts crawl in and out of my consciousness, and I am aware of the possibilities that surround me.

I steadfastly remain grateful.

“It is impossible to feel grateful and depressed in the same moment.” ~Naomi Williams, Body, Mind and Spirit

I was surprised, thrilled and deeply honored to have my first ever BlogHer post about attending BlogHer with a disability featured on the cover (which I understand is hallowed ground) of the BlogHer website. I wrote it not only for myself, but also for the disability community I speak to every day. They continue to inspire and empower me. I am ironically grateful for my diagnosis, because without it I would never have had a chance to meet the incredible people who have entered my life.

I will always be grateful.

“A noble person is mindful and thankful for the favors he receives from others.” ~The Buddha

Good and bad, decent and evil may enter into our lives at any given moment. These are the realities of our world. These are also the truths of aging.

I believe we all have two options. Yes, it really is that simple. We can choose from Column A or B.

My wise and beloved uncle once told me, “Life is for the living.” He told me to enjoy my life, drink it all in, and savor every pleasant moment. He said the world is a wondrous place, and it was up to me to live each day fully. He lived by his words, and I choose to do the same.

Which column will you choose?

One More BlogHer Post: The Conclusion Of Attending BlogHer With A Disability

Sheryl Sandberg (COO, Facebook and author of "Lean In") told me to contact her so she could put me in touch with an active disabilities group she is close to!

There are many blog posts about the mega BlogHer event that concluded in Chicago last Sunday. Each post I read was wonderful, detailing the unique camaraderie between bloggers, discussing the many brands at the Expo Hall and sponsored parties and whether they were midlife friendly, and talking about what they learned both from the speakers and their own personal experiences.

Generation Fabulous bloggers

As a writer and a health advocate, I want to put my two cents in from the point of view of a midlifer and someone living with a disability.

I had many concerns before going to BlogHer because of the enormity of the event. Would I be up to the task of reaching my personal BlogHer goals without re-awakening the monster of MS?

The Queen is in the house! Queen Latifah hosting BlogHer Voices of the Year Award ceremony

Stress: The enormity of BlogHer caused me great stress, even before leaving my front door. (Stress can exacerbate MS, so you have to try keep it to a minimum as best as you can.) How did I “de-stress”?

One word: Friendships.

BlogHer

At this point in my life, I never imagined I’d meet so many like-minded women that would become my close friends. It’s seems extraordinary to be able to form an instant bond with so many people I’ve known for less than a year. I can’t explain it. I won’t analyze it. I’m simply grateful the gods looked down on me and decided to gift me with their presence.

Fatigue: My body tells me to N-A-P when I need to. Since BlogHer was taking place in two hotels a few miles apart. I was worried about the fatigue factor.

There was a lot of walking during the day, and sometimes I felt my legs might give out in the middle of the hallway.

But something new happened. At least new to me.

Fun with friends and meeting Marshall Weinbaum, PR for Disney

A little back story: Twenty years ago, I walked with a cane and drove with hand controls. I got stares (really!) and heard some whispers (once I overheard someone say I was “faking” it. Why in the world would I fake the need for a cane?)

Even a well-known New York City anchorman asked me why I was using a cane when he spotted me walking toward my car parked in the handicapped spot! (The last time I saw him, he was relegated to reading tweets on CNN to Wolf Blitzer.)

Pure ignorance.

Pizza and Juice

At BlogHer, I found people to be helpful and compassionate. Exhibitors were kind and caring if I asked to sit in their chair (particularly James at WeMontage, Natalie at BackBlaze and Kristi and Kelly at Serta. How I loved that bed and pillow!)

Next year, I hope BlogHer will consider holding the event at a place that is more accessible for people with disabilities. The venue was lovely in Chicago, but if it could be held under one roof, or in two venues closer to each other, that would make all the difference.

The view from our window - lovely Chicago

Awareness: There is more awareness about the difficulties of living with a disability since the enactment of The Americans with Disabilities Act. Awareness can lead to compassion and compassion can lead to hope. Hope of a tomorrow where we will only notice each others abilities.

At BlogHer, I felt hope come alive. I felt the compassion (“Cath, are you tired? Let’s take a break.”) I felt the tolerance (“Cath, do you need to slow down? Let’s get some coffee.”) And I felt the hope (“Why don’t you get in touch with me? I’ll hook you up with my mother-in-law’s disability group.”)

BlogHer

Gusher Alert: BlogHer was an extraordinary experience for me for many reasons. As a newbie I was told I would learn a little, but would end up enjoying the company of friends more than anything. They were right. If I had a quarter for every laugh and silly joke we shared I’d be a millionaire. I came home feeling as if I were on Cloud Nine (except for the horrible all-day event of flying home.) You are all exceptionally fabulous women, and it is my great honor to know you.

Because of you, I didn't mind being silly in front of the camera.

Being silly

I'd like to thank my roommate, Lois Alter Mark, who tolerated my ear plugs and eye mask and turning up the heat while she was in the bathroom. You are a gem of a friend.

I'd also like to particularly thank Sharon Hodor Greenthal for the day she invited me to join Generation Fabulous. I am deeply indebted to you.

Conclusion: Attending large conferences are possible for people with disabilities. As I said in my post about attending BlogHer with a disability, pre-planning, taking breaks and communicating your needs are important ways to stay healthy while enjoying yourself at a conference.

How did you take care of yourself when attending BlogHer?

Attending BlogHer With A Disability

Author's note: I’ve read many blog posts, posts on Facebook and tweets about BlogHer. But no one wrote about attending BlogHer with a disability. As a newbie to this event, I’m sure there will be many attendees with disabilities. This post is for you as much as it is for me. For those of you who are blessed not to have a disability, I know you are compassionate and caring enough to want to read this post as well.

When I first heard people discussing something called BlogHer, I wondered what the heck it was. As I began reading more and more posts about it – the good, the bad and the ugly – I realized the enormity of this prodigious blogging event.

Yet something instinctual, something deep in the pit of my stomach, held me back from registering.

I told friends I wasn’t going because we already had two planned vacations for the summer, and didn’t want to spend extra time away from writing to attend this event.

But I wasn’t being honest, with my friends or myself.

It wasn’t the time away from home that held me back. It was something bigger than that.

Hi, my name is Cathy Chester and I have a disability.

Having Multiple Sclerosis since the age of 26 prevented me from doing certain things with my life. But when life took a turn, I changed course and made different plans.

Who among us lives our life the way we envisioned when we were younger? My MS is someone else’s fibromyalgia or breast cancer or OCD.

Back to BlogHer. My worst enemies are stress, heat and fatigue. My best friends are naps, air-conditioning and calm. If I don’t meet up with my best friends, the little gremlins come out to make my legs and arms weak and numb, rendering me useless and frustrated.

BlogHer takes place at two hotels, the Sheraton and McCormick. Since they are a few miles apart, you’ll need a shuttle or taxi to travel to each hotel. This alone caused me some stress, since I understood the day sessions were taking place at the Sheraton. That would’ve made it easier to slip away to catch a nap upstairs in my room.

Napping now must be a planned event. More running around means more fatigue.

The enormity of BlogHer is overwhelming for everyone. Add a disability into that equation, and your emotions easily turn into panic mode.

There are agendas, speakers, parties and networking to learn and make decisions about. Pre-planning your schedule may tame some of your anxiety and stress.

The question on what to wear always looms large for me. Business casual can either mean black jeans or a cute dress. The idea of wearing heels to walk from session to session makes me cringe.

Unfortunately, I had to kick my high heel habit after looking drunk too many times from falling on my keister. When you can’t feel your feet, you can’t handle heels.

I miss wearing high heels. You look leaner, and they compliment any outfit.

Here are my own reasons for disliking having to live with a disability:

Standing out from the crowd.
Complaining about not feeling well.
Excusing myself early from something fun.
Not being able to join in on something I know I’d enjoy.
Wearing flats and sneakers all of the time.
Having to sit when I’m tired while everyone else is standing.
Knowing anyone is worrying about me.

I made peace with having a disability a long time ago. As a writer and health advocate, my professional life is devoted to writing for the disabled community.

But being in Chicago for 3 days with 5,000 other bloggers while trying to learn, network and meet up with friends is something I look forward to, but is creating anxiety for me at the same time.

What’s a girl to do?

Here are a few things I can do for myself (and you can, too) to “de-stress” and prepare for BlogHer:

Use the BlogHer app. I read the agenda and the list of sponsors and speakers from the BlogHer website. Then I created a general (yet flexible) schedule for myself under “My Schedule”. Having a central location to check my schedule, detailing when the sessions, breaks and parties are, makes me feel more in control and less anxious. I’ve shared my schedule with friends, and found other people who will be attending.
Where are the bathrooms? This is important for people who tire easily or use scooters, walkers or canes. On the BlogHer app, check out their “Maps” section, or call the Sheraton or McCormick Place for further information. Find out ahead of time where the bathrooms, elevators, escalators or ramps are located.
Prioritize. After looking at all of the sessions, speakers and parties, I’ve prioritized what’s most important to what’s least important. Attend sessions that are more important for your niche, and skip the ones that are not as relevant.
Rest when you can. This is a biggie. Listen to your body; you know the signals. If it’s telling you to slow down and take a break, do it!

Use the Serenity Suite to relax and collect yourself whenever you feel the need to unwind. (Room 1237 at Sheraton and Room W471A at McCormick)

Lori Luna, VP of Event Operations, kindly provided me with further information on attending sessions at The McCormick:

“There are multiple elevators and escalators so walking up and down is VERY limited. Nine of the session tracks are all together, and the remaining five are one elevator ride away, and again, lined in a row. Additionally we'll have a Serenity Suite where you can go and rest while at McCormick Place.

It can sound daunting and when you see it you might feel the same, but once you navigate it, you will note we are stacked on top of all of our activations so you aren't walking football fields.”

Ask for help: This one took me a long time to do. But, as my friend Ellen Dolgen, the Menopause Awareness Expert says, “Reaching out is IN! Suffering in Silence is OUT!” There’s no shame in asking for help. Everyone needs help now and then, whether you have a disability or not. So if you need something, ask, ask ASK.

Attending BlogHer should be a special time for you to completely dedicate to yourself and hone your craft. So take time to breathe, relax and enjoy yourself. You deserve it!

Note: This post was originally featured on the Generation Fabulous website on July 22, 2013.

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