Why You Should Never Make Snap Judgements

Do you judge a book by its cover? Try this and see. Let's say you're perusing the aisles of a bookstore and you come across two original book covers, without titles, that pique your interest. One illustrates the branches of an old brown tree with its leaves spread wide in a light shade of green. The other cover is a blood-red horse on a children's carousel looking angry and violent yet somehow beautiful.

Now, imagine if you walked down those same aisles but this time the same books were wrapped in plain brown paper. The titles appear without any illustration. You'd be forced to make your purchase based on the title alone. Does it intrigue you? Will the story hold your interest? Will it frighten you? Will you learn something new? Will you be spiritually, emotionally or creatively fulfilled? Will you miss the characters after you finish the book?

Will you be able to make a choice?

You'd have to take a leap of faith instead of making an informed decision.

I loved this idea from a bookstore in Australia

If you haven't guessed by now my book cover descriptions were based on the original illustrations for "To Kill a Mockingbird" and "The Catcher in the Rye." Would you have purchased them as described?

I have to be honest with myself that I would have purchased the first book but not the second. That means I would have missed out on reading THE greatest classic ever written about teenage angst and alienation. That would have been a shame.

We all judge books by their covers despite our best intentions to the contrary. We make snap judgments based on little fact.

We do the same with people.

Science backs up my hypothesis. In an article in TIME magazine titled "Our Brains Immediately Judge People" Alexandra Sifferlin states:

"Even if we cannot consciously see a person’s face, our brain is able to make a snap decision about how trustworthy they are."

As much as we hate to admit it we all judge people. We like to think we don't but we do. We immediately size each other up, looking for cues that will, subconsciously, predict how someone's character will be.

Which cashier at a checkout counter will you choose? Which player will you pick for your team? Which sales clerk will best answer your questions?

Are your presumptions based on bias and assumptions or a gut feeling?

It's a good thing I don't always make judgements as badly as I did with the original cover of J.D. Salinger's book. I can't imagine how many wonderful opportunities I would have missed in my life and how different my path would have been.

"Whether we think it’s right or not, even our forewarning mothers can’t help but judge books by their covers. So as we stroll along through the library of life, looking at all the faces on the shelves and in the stacks, it’s important to be aware of where our habits of thought may lead us: to accuracy or to error."~Nicolas Rule, Snap Judgement Science: Intuitive Decisions About Other People

Approving or disapproving of someone based on a quick observation or past experience is not always in our best interest. We need to pause and consider how and why we feel the way we do before making a final judgement.

Our negative snap judgements impacts others. Is that fair? Think what a difference it'd make if, instead of negative thinking, we chose kindness instead.

The world would be a better place.

People aren't wrong because they disagree with you. They simply see the world through a different lens; their experiences and circumstances are different than yours.

"Cultivate an attitude of curiosity to better understand why others look and behave in ways other than what you prefer." ~Judith Johnson, Author/Speaker/Life Coach/Interfaith Minister, "Why You Should Break the Habit of Snap Judgements", The Huffington Post

We need to be more curious and learn more about one another. We need more tolerance, compassion and understanding in the world.

And it should begin with me and you.

Ask yourself how that homeless man became homeless, or why that woman's opinion is different than yours. How did that couple become financially ruined or why are those children wearing tattered-looking clothes?

Everyone has a story. What's theirs? The story doesn't have to be closely aligned with our own to be okay. The world would be a boring place if we were all the same.

Next time you make a snap judgement about someone, pause and listen to your inner chatter. Consider why someone might be the way they are. Look at it from all sides. Walk around in their shoes for a bit. Be thoughtful and kind in your judgement. Open your own lens to see what might be inside theirs. You may be in for a sweet surprise.

Because a book should not be judged by its cover.

What Is The Name Of The Book That Has Changed My Life? (Giveaway)

I'm talking about yoga again because of the physical benefits it offers to anyone searching for a healthier way of life. These include increased flexibility and muscle strength, improved energy and vitality, maintaining a balanced metabolism, weight reduction, cardio health and protection from injury.

It’s also about breathwork, meditation, stretching and mindfulness. All of this can put you on a path toward a healthier YOU.

For anyone living with any ailment from A to Z the tenets of yoga can help you.

“I have witnessed how yoga provides a healing path for my students. The thousands of sessions as their instructor have provided me with hope for the future that those with multiple sclerosis (MS) and neuromuscular conditions can live a quality life.” ~Mindy Eisenberg

Photo: Property of Yoga Moves MS

That’s why I’m thrilled to introduce you to a book I found that helps bring adaptive yoga right into your home. I was excited to find it for myself and now I'd like to share it with you.

The name of the book is Adaptive Yoga Moves Any Body and its author, Mindy Eisenberg, has been teaching yoga to students with MS and other neuromuscular conditions for 11 years. And with amazing results.

I met Mindy at the recent Consortium of Multiple Sclerosis Centers annual meeting where she had a busy exhibit hall booth. It took me two days to finally catch up with her! When I did I soon realized that if I lived in Michigan she’d definitely be my new BFF. I loved her overwhelming passion to help anyone struggling with disease with the growing Yoga Moves community she created.

A few of Mindy's happy students

Having a conversation with Mindy was inspiring.

“My students are my inspiration and I take great pride in our growing Yoga Moves community. They bright light to darkness, courage to fear, inspiration to despair, and healing to suffering. They make me feel as though I am the luckiest yoga instructor on the planet.” ~Mindy Eisenberg, Adaptive Yoga Moves Any Body

For anyone unfamiliar with adaptive yoga here's my explanation of it. When my son was young I’d drive him to grade school (fifteen minutes from our home) and then, once a week, head to yoga class. It was an intermediate class and I was able to keep up with fellow students.

Today my MS has given me a few added challenges. Practicing adaptive yoga fits the bill, with my instructor tweaking my practice to suit my new needs.

Here's Mindy’s explanation of adaptive yoga:

"What is Adaptive Yoga? Those with movement challenges require a more creative approach to traditional postures.

In this book, traditional standing poses are presented with adaptations seated in a chair or lying down on a mat. Likewise, traditional seated poses that are commonly practiced on the mat are adapted so that individuals receive similar benefits when they are practiced in a chair.”

Over the years I’ve looked for a book that would allow me to practice yoga at home on the days there was no class. I searched and searched and came up empty.

Enter Mindy’s book and BAM! When I opened it I felt like I was welcoming a yoga instructor and fellow students into my home.

As you leaf through the book there's page after page of helpful photographs of people (all MIndy’s students - isn’t that wonderful?) demonstrating a specific pose, along with explanations of the pose’s primary benefits, any precautions, and a list of props to have on hand.

There are adaptations and variations on poses, as well as thoughtful quotes from Mindy’s students. All of this rounds out the feeling that you're in the right place.

At the back of the book are lists, with photos, of any specific move you may be looking for. For example, there’s a page of poses for “Computer Break Sequence” (don’t we all need that?) with fifteen different poses listed underneath and where you can find them in the book.

On the righthand side of the page is an outline of Energetic Qualities, Time Estimates and Props.

There are four pages of definitions in case you have any questions, and two pages of useful resources for organizations along with suggested readings and recordings.

I was so bowled over by the beauty of this book that I began reading it on the plane ride home. It helped me feel that I can feel good about myself despite my diagnosis, that I can be part of not only the yoga movement but also become part of a large (loving) community.

Mindy’s passion is evident in every word she writes because this was a true labor of love, As she says:

“Very simply, my Yoga Moves students asked me to write a guide for them. They enjoyed how they felt during and after completing a class, and wanted to continue their practice at home. Experience showed them that the benefits of yoga dramatically increased with more frequent practice. They needed a way to remember the poses and techniques and asked me for a few photos with accompanying instructions.

The more I spoke with other yoga instructors, practitioners, and medical professionals about the idea for an adaptive yoga book, the more it became apparent that there was a need for a comprehensive, user-friendly guide. With their simple request, my students unknowingly sent me on a five year journey researching and writing. Adaptive Yoga Moves Any Body to honor their appeal.”

I can’t stress enough how much I love this book! It feels like I finally found something (and someone) to help me reach my wellness goals. Now I can do my yoga routine in the comfort of my home knowing that I have a safe place to fall, in the arms of a book and a community. Thanks, Mindy.

Namaste.

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NOTE: This is a comprehensive guide for everyone that’s ideal for:

Any body
Individuals with MS and neuromuscular conditions
Caregivers or family members of those with movement challenges
New yoga students
Experienced yogis who desire a home reference
Yoga instructors seeking to learn how to adapt poses

Proceeds from the book go to Yoga Moves MS, a non-pro t, 501(c) (3) organization dedicated to providing therapeutic yoga for individuals with MS and neuromuscular conditions. It’s available at yogamovesms.org/book or Amazon. For more information email mindy@yogamovesms.org or visit yogamovesms.org

COMING SOON: Videos of sequences to complement the book and instruction!!

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GREAT NEWS!!! I am giving away two copies of MIndy's book! Leave a comment below for a chance to win Adaptive Yoga Moves Any Body. The winners will receive a notice via email. Contest ends at midnight on July 12, 2016. Good luck!

DISCLOSURE: I received one free copy of Adaptive Yoga Moves Any Body. I did not receive compensation for this review. All opinions are, as always, completely my own.

The Magic Of A Bookstore. If You Can Still Find One.

“I love walking into a bookstore. It's like all my friends are sitting on shelves, waving their pages at me.” ~Tahereh Mafi

Yesterday my husband had to meet a client in the late afternoon. We'd planned on attending a jazz concert at that time at a local college, but late Sunday afternoon was the only time his client was available.

I was disappointed that we weren't going to attend the concert, something we enjoyed together on a semi-regular basis. But when he told me his meeting was at Barnes and Noble, a favorite hangout I hadn't visited in a long time, my mood changed.

I was delighted.

Being weaned on books by two parents who are still avid readers, reading has always played an important role in my life. I was an English literature major in college because of it, and became a writer to try to weave words together to tell a good story.

I admittedly order my books from Amazon or directly onto my Kindle. I say "admittedly" because when people first started using tablets or ordering online I was a little embarrassed and, not wanting to be lambasted by my book group, I'd say things like, "I hardly order online" or "I still prefer buying the actual book from a bookstore, but if I'm traveling the tablet is easier."

With the advent of the Internet and the demise of the bookstore I feel sad thinking that my son's generation and the ones who follow won't know what it feels like to lose yourself in a bookstore for hours. What the smell and tactile sensation of touching and leafing through book after book does for the soul. What it feels like to sit cross-legged on the floor, thoroughly absorbed in the prose of what you are reading.

Mom passing on her love of reading to two of her grandsons

When my son was young we had fun going to Barnes and Noble's Storytime when parents would bring their young children to have stories read aloud. It was a magical time for us, and afterward I would tell my son to choose a book he'd like to bring home.

Sigh. I miss those days.

When I walked into the store yesterday it was like visiting an old friend. That smell - ah - how I love that book smell that pours over you. It's as calming and restorative as smelling the fragrance of peonies.

The store seemed more crowded now with it's holiday offerings and displays of specially priced books. But to me it was like going home. And the hour and a half that I had to myself seemed magical. Not only because I had a chance to leisurely peruse book after book, but also because my momentary flashes of memories brought me back to a time and place of complete serenity.

That is the power of a bookstore.

Facing Our Challenges One Story At A Time (Book Review)

NOTE: I’ve been living with a disability for over 26 years. Since then I’ve heard countless ways that people try in order to feel better and overcome their challenges.

I don’t endorse any medications or any path for a person to try. I believe we each must find what works best for our own unique journey.

The following is the story of one man's journey.

One of my personal and professional goals is to change the face of disability. To change the way people look at illness, and to take a step closer toward a better understanding of the human condition.

Because of the indomitable spirit of the author of the book, "Shadow Summit: One Man, His Diagnosis, And The Road To A Vibrant Life” I decided to do a book review to illustrate a story of one person's dedication to finding answers to better health.

Photo: JonChandonnet.com

Jon Chandonnet was completing his Master’s Degree program at MIT with a promising job offer from Sapient when, at age 27, he received a shattering diagnosis.

He had Multiple Sclerosis.

But Jon didn’t have time for MS. It wasn't a part of his plan for success, and he would not let anything stand in his way.

He chose to ignore his disease. He remained in denial for six years, setting out to prove to himself, and to everyone around him at work and at home, that he didn’t have an autoimmune disease.

He ran in several marathons. He climbed mountain after mountain, some with peaks over 14,000 feet.

He thought he found his answer: keep MS at bay by running and climbing.

His family remained supportive of his choices. Until the MS finally caught up with him, and his life began to crumble.

He lost function in his limbs and was unable to keep up the fast pace at his job. His speech became affected, and he was falling down.

He began to lose hope.

The last straw happened on his wedding day, when he gathered all of his energy to finish his first dance with his lovely new bride. Barely making it through the dance, he realized his MS was beginning to win the battle.

Fortunately for Jon, his family held an intervention, showing him through tough love that he must begin paying attention to his MS.

After trying FDA approved disease-modifying medications, he decided they weren't working. Then Jon learned about the Optimum Health Institute (OHI) in San Diego where, since its opening in 1976, “over 75,000 people from around the world had visited…to improve not only their health, but also their lives.”

Jon signed up to try the Institute for one week.

Once there, he ate raw foods, drank water and Rejuvelac, became mindful of what he put into his body, and occasionally spent days fasting.

“Digestion placed a huge metabolic load on the body that was lifted when a person ate raw plant-based foods and cleansed their color. The energy used to digest enzyme-depleted, cooked food, was freed to help the body heal. Raw food meant less effort for my struggling body, and possibly resulted in more energy.”

After three weeks his body began to respond to the program, and eventually it reversed many of his MS symptoms.

The results from the program were amazing, and he learned a new mantra that he planned on living by for the rest of his life:

Mind, Body, Spirit and Emotion

Paying attention to these four areas would help him achieve his dreams of professional and financial success.

I would recommend this book to anyone who enjoys inspirational books, and for people looking for a new way to look at disease. I found it a little long-winded at times, but generally it was a quick and interesting read.

Read more of Jon’s book to learn about the rest of his incredible journey. (Book release date is November 2013. It will be available on Amazon.com)

END NOTE: For anyone faced with a physical challenge, find what works best for you. Be our own best advocate by asking questions, doing research, following your instincts and never settling for an answer unless it feels right to you.

Above all, respect and honor another person’s journey, and their successes, as you would want them to honor yours.

That is what will help us begin to change the face of disability.

What challenges have you faced?

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