An Empowered Spirit Blog Post

How Bette Davis, Eleanor Roosevelt and Valerie Harper Are Examples Of Aging Gracefully

By Cathy Chester on March 27, 2013

“Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them.  The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.” ~Voltaire

Shh.  Listen.  Do you hear that?

The gentle whispers of brave souls who have gone before us.  They are part of the fabric of who we are today.  Courageous women are quietly sharing their parables filled with wisdom.  They discuss the enormity of the adversities they faced.  They tell tales of meeting their challenges with bravery, honesty, and humility.

I picture them sitting in a room with large, fluffy pillows scattered about like Oprah might have for a gal pal sleepover.  On one pillow sits Bette Davis (her pillow is embroidered with her “Old Age Is Not For Sissies” quote), holding court and discussing the challenges of breast cancer with Joan of Arc, who tries to explain the ridiculous sentencing by the English after labeling her a heretic. Eleanor Roosevelt easily chats with Rose Kennedy about staying married to an unfaithful husband.  Babe Didrikson Zaharias and Althea Gibson swap stories about their gift of athleticism when the wide world of sports was strictly a men-only club.

Their whispers envelop us, subliminally reminding us that these brave women paved our road, demonstrating how we can travel alongside adversity by aging gracefully with bravery, honesty, and humility.

The Open Road

We all heard the recent shocking news about veteran actress Valerie Harper receiving a diagnosis of incurable brain cancer.  Like all of her fans, I was devastated.  Yet in the face of her adversity, Harper maintained her usual effervescent style by living every moment to the fullest.  As she said in a recent Today Show interview, “It could be a week, three months, and several years.  I’m not dying until I do.”

“None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm.” ~Henry David Thoreau

Aging gracefully is not only about finding the perfect wrinkle cream, the best way to lose belly fat, or buying the perfect outfit for a dinner party.  Aging gracefully is more about learning from our past teachers and those who live among us.  Their attitudes and steadfastness in the face of tremendous obstacles have proven how we, too, can face the inevitability of getting older with determination and grit.

In her book “Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom,” Dr. Christiane Northrup discusses our ageist culture and how it convinces women that menopause signals the end of vitality and attractiveness.  She suggests, “What we can do is consider ourselves pioneers on a new frontier, one at which menopause and aging will be redefined.  This is clearly possible…I see this happening everywhere I go as women worldwide decide to age with power, strength, and beauty.”

“The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.  It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she knows.” ~ Audrey Hepburn

My recipe for aging gracefully is a simple one:

  1. Look in the mirror and see the beauty within you.
  2. Reflect on the blessings surrounding you each day.
  3. Begin a gratitude journal and list three positive things you learned that day.
  4. List three things you like about yourself.
  5. Read biographies about people you admire.
  6. Make time to take walks and notice the beauty in nature.
  7. Tell the people you love how you feel about them (including your pets.)
  8. Each day is a gift, each hour an opportunity to enjoy life.
  9. Follow your passions.
  10. Take time to laugh, sing, dance, and be silly.

What's your recipe for aging gracefully?

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Author

Cathy Chester

Comments

  1. The thoughts in this article are profound and important for all of us to consider. Thanks for sharing.

    I also love the idea of the blog hop--how do I "hop" on?

  2. Love your recipe, Cathy! And you're so right that the spirits of the women who've gone before us should help inspire and energize us. Beautiful post.
    Karen

  3. Beauty is a reflection of the soul. Amen to that. And what are we if we can't learn from those who came before? That's right, we'd be running around in circles trying to figure out what to do next LOL. Nice post. 🙂

  4. Lovely post, Cathy. I am "filled with the gentle whispers of the brave souls who have gone before" me including my grandmothers.

  5. I love the concept of those fabulous women sitting around having a convo about these things! Would love to be a fly on the wall with Bette Davis and Eleanor Roosevelt. With Dorothy Parker perhaps dropping in an acidic word or two.

  6. Wonderful post...your description of those powerful, historically significant women in conversation drew me in. Such wisdom and strength! You've given us much to think about.

  7. I have a new definition of heaven and it's going to that pillow party with all those fabulous women. You painted a wonderful picture. I'm off to find and tivo that episode of that "Cleveland" episode.

  8. A powerful post! I love this: “None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm.” ~Henry David Thoreau. You are so very right about following the lead of those who've gone before us. And I love your idea of a gratitude journal. I recently starting putting "good news" into a Mason jar, to be read on New Year's Eve to remember all the good that came throughout the year that I likely will have forgotten about by then.

  9. I love everything about this piece -- the amazing women you honor here, the quotes and especially your recipe. That's a list that should be hanging on every woman's mirror. I'm going to find a good biography of one of these heroines -- nothing is more inspiring than women who are aging gracefully in their own unique way. Like the GenFab women. Like you. xo

  10. You have inner beauty and wisdom, my friend. What a lovely and thoughtful post. So enjoyed it, Cathy.

  11. You, and all these other fantastic ladies participating in this bloghop, are proving that menopause is absolutely NOT the end of vitality and vibrancy.

    Three marvelous things about you that I've noticed: 1) you are a natural at being social, 2) you are hugely supportive of other women and their dreams and goals, and 3) you are an inspiration of vibrancy to everyone whose life you touch. for being you.

    Thank you.

  12. There is something so powerful about the idea of women sitting together, talking, and lifting eachother.
    And in pj's with wine ... can we do that?

  13. Now this is a recipe I am going to keep and follow to the letter! I think I might just print this out and post it on my mirror. What a wonderful post. I love your perspective on aging gracefully 🙂

    Holly

  14. Cathy, I think you and I would have an immediate connection were we to sit down over a cup of coffee or tea!! Your post resonates with everything I believe...and you wrote it so beautifully!! Well done...enjoyed every minute!

  15. I think one of the problems for us mature women is that we had a few great women to look up to.....Here's hoping, that because of sheer numbers and experience we can be the mentors for all the women who have not yet hit the "mature" status.....

  16. Well this just makes me want to stand on my chair and yell BOOYAH at the top of my lungs. My blog partner, Barbara Joy, is a huge Dr. N fan. She introduced me to her work. Thank you for the fabulous imagery, thoughtfulness, and kick ass piece of work!

  17. Cathy, what a wonderful perspective you took when writing this story. You are so right. The women before us are the heart and soul of who we are today. Great advice. Thanks for sharing.

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